10 things you should never say to a single woman

The bachelor is a normal girl. And yet, clichés die hard … Worse, some come out without our knowledge and fall like a Camembert in the soup. Clear? The one who throws them passes for a quiche, the one who hears them takes out the flamethrower. For world peace and the good of friendship, stop the anti-celibate phrases!

1. Lucky, you have time
it is well known, the single CANNOT have things to do that couples would not do, so she necessarily has time. FYI, telling a bachelor that she has time is explaining to her how empty her life is, aimless and meaningless. If she chokes on her cappuccino, it’s emotion.

2. We share?
No, the bachelor has nothing against sharing. She has something against couples who, in the “we share”, hear half her and half them, compared to their joint account which is one. And who make her contribute, with her single salary, the same amount as a couple with double salary and four zeros.

3. You must have fun!
In the common imagination of the girlfriend as a couple, the bachelor goes out every night, empties three magnums of champagne, and chooses between Brad Pitt and George Clooney before going to bed. Implied “without that, your life must be so sad, my darling, why are you looking at me like that?”.

4. I have a guy for you
First, not all single people want to settle down. Secondly, all the bachelors who want to settle down dread the blind date with the Michel Blanc look-alike from Les Bronzés, or even the lover of small lead soldiers who lives with his mother. Three, the bachelor is tall, thank you for her, she prefers to do her shopping alone.

5. So what are dating sites like?
Talking about dating sites to a single person is like asking a girl in a relationship when she is going to have a child: not all girls in a relationship are going to lay in the year, not all singles scour the internet. search for a parent, and both of them do not necessarily want to talk about it.

6. I admire you, I could not
In principle, the bachelor loves. We explain to her with subtlety that really, she has no luck, and that if we were not lucky enough to have a Jules in the doghouse, we would swallow an expired yogurt straight away rather than survive alone in this atrocious world. that is his. Yes, yes, she loves it.

7. We’re going for the weekend with a cousin, would you like to come?
Yes, yes, it’s very flattering to play filler to avoid odd numbers. The single person usually appreciates the attention to the highest point, and if she hangs up without saying goodbye, it is to go and express her joy over a punching bag.

8. Fortunately, you have your job!
Implied? My poor thing, if you didn’t have your job, you really wouldn’t have anything in life. Also works with “luckily you got your cat / your mom / the money / you got me,” and quite honestly deserves a zesty pie.

9. Do you take the sofa bed?
She’s single, that makes sense. In addition to needing less space, she has a sense of sacrifice, it goes with the condition, and then she necessarily sleeps in pilou-pilou pajamas, since she has no boyfriend. She will therefore be happy to sleep in the living room, invaded from 7 am by early risers.

10. And where are you looking, if not?
In other words, the single woman must necessarily do something to remedy this abominable and inhuman situation. Besides, if she doesn’t, it’s because she has a problem. We would like to say that single does not mean looser, neither frustrated, nor unhappy, but we would be afraid to shock.