How to live a happy and lasting relationship? A good relationship does not happen by accident. Like any other relationship, this one takes a lot of effort and commitment.
The bet is far from won, because the fear of being rejected or disappointing often prevents us from believing or even aspiring to this agreement. The best couples are not spared and they also sometimes wonder about the very nature of the ties that united them. And in this case, it is important to ask the real questions.
Do you feel in phase with your relationship? How do you take your differences into account? Do you take specific actions to increase the intimacy and complicity of your couple? Does your partner feel loved, appreciated and wanted enough?
Here are some tips that will help you see more clearly: 3 keys to getting along better in your relationship.
1 Dare to be vulnerable
The ego has a psychic shell that we are all reluctant to give up. The habit of wearing it is often the reason for our suffering and we mistakenly think that this shell will protect us from blows. Add to that our conditioning. I don’t know about you, but as far as I’m concerned, I grew up in a family where vulnerability is very frowned upon.
What if I told you now that there is nothing truer and stronger than vulnerability? Being vulnerable with the one you love is to free yourself from your weight, to love and open up more, to get closer and reconnect with yourself.
Don’t worry, anyway the critics will criticize, the judges will judge and it is certainly not your ego that can get you out of this bad moment. The real solution or rather, the attitude to adopt in the face of attacks is precisely to make your vulnerability a force.
Dare to be vulnerable takes practice. Do not be discouraged and do not let fear cripple you, for you have everything to gain from it. You will be surprised at how much warmth and love you will receive from sharing your vulnerability. Love is also understanding, sharing and emotional support.
2 Accept your partner
Accept what you cannot change. Trying to change the other to be compatible with your lifestyle, often conceals the subconscious desire to be omnipotent and to control everything around you.
“Special New News Flash”: There is nothing more frustrating than sharing your life with someone who wants to be in control and can’t let go.
Remember your first dates. What attracted you to each other? Your points in common, of course, but that’s not all. Think about your differences and why they appealed to you so much. What has changed in you since? Why are these same traits annoying you so much now?
In many cases, the differences that annoy us in the other are those that we would like to have or develop within ourselves. Hence the battles we wage and the internal conflicts that prevent us from moving forward.
If your partner’s traits or quirks don’t go against your core values and endanger your relationship, let them be and express what they want to express. You should even support him and offer him your full support.
Focus on the positive. The more you pay close attention to it, the wider your field of vision. After a while you will be able to instantly see what you value and have difficulty even discerning what was bothering you. In this way, you rebalance the scale and you de-dramatize.
3 be best friends
We live in a culture that is very self-centered. And we tend to forget one of the biggest rule of all relationships:
“Strive to do to others what you would like them to do for you” Saint Luke.
Learn to live friendship and good humor on a daily basis with your partner. True friends stick together and not afraid to speak their mind. They celebrate our victories and our successes, but also know how to be present in difficult times. So why would it be any different with your spouse?
Have you ever wondered what can make that, two individuals who are not blood related or in a romantic and / or s**xual relationship, love spending time together, just for fact? to be together ? Common hobbies? The amusements? I am afraid that is not enough. This attachment is the result of a decision. The firm decision to invest and give of oneself : love, acceptance, support, honesty, and frankness in the name of friendship.
How long it takes to create this type of relationship is up to you. For some it may take months for others years. Regardless, the friendship of your couple is like a garden. He must be looked after at all times. Water it with lots of love. Don’t overlook romance and s**x but always keep in mind that a strong friendship is the foundation for everything else.