The most frequent couple problems
What if we told you that all couples have the same problems? From the drop in desire to the weight of the routine, man or woman, the issues are more or less the same when it comes to living together. Fortunately, the solutions exist: a minimum of work, and it’s a jackpot for the happily ever after. Or almost.
Daily
It is he, the public enemy number 1. The daily newspaper which drowns us under the schedules of ministers, makes us think of the price of gasoline rather than darling (e), replaces the romantic evenings by the homework framed with children. Not really our fault, okay, but fatal.
What do we do?
We plan the moments one-on-one as we plan our sports lessons. And yes. Not very glamorous, but essential to avoid skipping shared moments. We set up a date night and we do not deviate from it, we go for weekends together once a month, we watch a movie or we go to a restaurant, but in pairs.
Libido
At first, we set the quilt on fire from morning to … the next morning. After a few years and a few children, we consider the gym session as a pitfall in our schedule or an essential step, but not really exciting. The good news? It’s normal.
What do we do?
We work. Yes, maintaining the flame requires a minimum of investment … We ask ourselves what would make us want and we talk about it, we take the time to touch each other, to rediscover each other in a different way … and we renew the pleasures by changing place, position, toys, games or readings. True, 50 Shades of Gray has done a lot for long-term couples’ libido.
Boredom
As a direct consequence of daily life and routine in a couple, boredom often ends up setting in. Not that we love our spouse less. We get bored, that’s all, always doing the same thing, always seeing the same people, always going to the same places and always talking about the same things.
What do we do?
We spice up! Routine is positive when it reassures, not when it locks up. To avoid the shackles, we go out of our comfort zone once in a while. We launch a new topic of discussion, we test a new activity, we change the day of the movie night, we try a new restaurant, we rearrange the living room… yes, it can be that simple.
Skip the opportunities
We celebrate the first month, the first semester, the first year, the anniversary of the meeting, of the first kiss, of the first night … and then one day, we skip the wedding anniversary, we no longer remember the date of the meeting and we forget Valentine’s Day. Nothing serious on paper, except that forgetting to celebrate your relationship is to forget your purpose a little more each time.
What do we do?
We give back to his couple the same importance as the birthday of the youngest or the promotion of darling. We take the time to celebrate everything we celebrated at the beginning, or almost, we make the effort to offer ourselves small gifts to keep track of them and to maintain the pleasure of making people happy.
To get lost
Have we already done it to you, the “I don’t know who I am” move? A classic among the classics, self-forgetting is responsible for a host of marriage problems. We give, we drown in the routine, we think of the other, we try to make everyone happy and we realize, one fine day, that we are no longer ourselves. And we don’t know how to become it again.
What do we do?
We take time for ourselves just as we take for the couple. Bath, reading break, yoga or meditation session, running, outing with girlfriends, solo weekends, everyone has their own thing. The main thing is to take stock to know where you are and what you want, since being good in your relationship is being good with yourself.
