5 things to keep in mind after breaking up

After a break up it’s always complicated.

When a relationship ends, we feel vulnerability and a lot of shame at first, then there is resentment and anger. 

Never forget your greatness, no matter how heartbreaking these moments are.

HERE ARE FIVE THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND AFTER A BREAKDOWN

1. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO SUBSTITUTE THE LOSS.

The devastation caused by heartache runs deep. Do not try to fill the gap or the wound at all costs. This is detrimental to your healing. You cannot heal when you enter into another relationship right after breaking up. Also, don’t rush on food or alcohol.

Therapy is a great tool for allowing emotions to flow in a productive way. Meditation, yoga, and hiking are examples of positive places for times when it’s too difficult to sit alone in times of sadness.

2. LOVE YOURSELF AND THE WORLD WILL SEE YOUR GREATNESS.

When you start to give yourself love and care, the world opens up to you as you greet your beautiful nature. You are the best candidate for love. You know yourself better than anyone. You have created a world around you and just because someone has left it does not mean your world has ended. Self-love is not selfish. Loving yourself is the most healing energy source there is. Take the time and space to love yourself and connect with nature.

3. YOU CAN MAKE A NEW START.

Your world has just collapsed. You have a hard time digesting the news. Take a step back and realize that this is a great opportunity for a fresh start. You don’t want to run after someone who doesn’t recognize your vastness and greatness. You want to prosper and be happy. Make a list of things you couldn’t do when you were with your partner. Take the opportunity to explore those parts that bring you joy.

4. THE PAIN OF A BREAK IS REAL.

Scientists at Columbia University in Manhattan, New York, studied the brains of students after a rupture using functional magnetic resonance imaging. These results revealed that when the participant receives a photo of their ex-partner, the brain reacts as if it was physical pain.

It’s like a physical illness, it takes time to heal. Your heart and mind will eventually heal. An unexpected breakup is painful. The mind and body will need time to readjust to all the events around it. Time is the best healer, but put no limits and expectations on it. The worst thing you can do is rush the healing process.

5. YOU ARE WORTHY.

After a break-up it’s common to ask yourself: ”  What did I do?” Wasn’t I good enough?  This will start to affect your self-esteem. You are worth more than the end of a relationship. Often, it’s not about what you did or didn’t do. The personalities clash. Relationships are powerful lessons and experiences. Instead of asking negative questions that negatively affect your self-esteem, instead ask yourself what lesson you have learned in this relationship and focus on the positive.