Just because you’ve finally settled into the comfortable stages of a relationship doesn’t mean it’s time to stop trying hard to keep things exciting.
You never want to feel your partner pulling away, and there are several daily habits you can do that will help keep the romance alive in your relationship.
This doesn’t mean you should start doing things you hate or fulfilling your partner’s every wish.
Instead, it involves cultivating an ongoing intimacy that benefits both of you and keeps the relationship fresh.
“Humans love novelty,” says psychologist Kate Balestrieri, Psy.D.
“When we start a relationship, everything our partner does is tolerable, adorable, and even atrractive.
After a while, the novelty wears off and we are left with the familiar.
The familiar is great.
This allows us to deepen our intimacy and feel safe.
The problem is that the familiar can generate boredom.
To keep that spark alive, shaking things up helps a lot.”
The responsibility lies with both partners to maintain a good relationship, but if you don’t know where to start, there are several ways to do your part.
Here are seven small daily relationship habits you can do to help keep things interesting, according to experts.
1. Ask Questions About Their Daily Lives
Start by showing your interest in the form of questions about your partner’s day.
“Recognize what’s important to him (whether it’s work, friends, etc.) and ask him about it,” said therapist Catherine Silver.
“Do it even if you’re not necessarily interested. If it’s important to your partner, it means a lot to them that you’re making the effort to hear about it.”
2. Make a Sweet Little Gesture
“Do something small so your partner knows you’ve thought of them,” says therapist Crystal Clancy.
This could be something as simple as making coffee or writing a note.
Small acts of kindness can go a long way and will be appreciated in the long run.
3. Acknowledge Your Partner’s Efforts
Let your partner know that you are grateful for some of the things he does for you.
“Acknowledge your partner’s efforts and let them know when something is working,” says Silver.
“People are usually more than happy to do whatever they can for someone they care about if they know they’re being recognized, and positive reinforcement can help the other person feel appreciated.”
4. Show Him You’re Thinking of Him
Show your partner that you’re thinking about him or her during the day, even if it’s something quick.
“That could be a message or a call, or even mentioning something at the end of the day that made you remember him,” says Silver.
“You don’t want your partner to feel like your relationship is ‘out of breath’, even if you are really secure in the relationship together.”
5. Have A Hobby Separate From Him
“It’s great if you have aligned interests, but when couples do everything together, they lose some of the individualizations that made them attractive to each other,” says Balestrieri.
“Our interests ignite passion and enthusiasm, which adds dimensionality (and novelty) to our personalities, and our partners will be drawn to that.”
So give each other space once in a while and then get together to talk about your experiences.
6. Greet each other with a physical touch
Whenever you see your partner, greet them warmly, as physical touch is important to keeping attraction alive.
“Instead of rushing to get to the next step (making dinner, going to an activity, working out), take a break and give him a hug and a kiss,” says Clancy.
Obviously, make sure it’s something you’re comfortable with, but it’s a quick and easy way to feel connected.
7. Do Something New
Even if you can’t go on a big trip together all the time, plan some weekend trips or day trips.
“Experience romance together for a blend of familiar and new to create cohesion and intimacy,” says Balestrieri.
“Couples who explore together learn new things, face challenges together, and create memories that will last forever.”
Each couple will have their own habits that work but participate in these daily activities to help keep the attraction alive for years to come.