The power of words is strong, so you need to know how to choose them carefully in your arguments or conversations, as some expressions can hurt your partner.
Words have enormous power, both for those who express them and for those to whom they are addressed. Even the smallest sentences should not be underestimated. Each syllable has the potential to inspire, help, or do a lot of damage. And this effect is even stronger within a couple; discover the 7 sentences that can hurt your partner.
When someone is angry they don’t really think about what they are saying and may hurt their partner. This results in negative feelings. However, in a union of love, we seek affection and respect.
A couple has its ups and downs; it is, therefore, necessary to think carefully before acting in the context of an argument. Saying what you think you are feeling right now could cause serious problems or even end your relationship.
What are the phrases that can hurt?
You’ve probably used a few of them, but there are certain phrases you should avoid at all costs in your relationship. Take note of these phrases that can hurt and you may well realize that it is ultimately easy to weaken your relationship as a couple by emotionally hurting your partner :
- “Sorry but…” : Apologizing by saying “but” does not help build confidence, credibility or intimacy.
- “Ah yes ? But if you… ”: Reversing the situation against your partner can end in an argument. This is seen as a threat to the connection they have made.
- “You… all the time” : This phrase opens the door to endless discussion and will make your partner feel like they’re being attacked.
- “You’re the same as…” : Pointing out the similarities between your partner and someone they don’t like is a dangerous way to criticize.
- “I don’t know why I am with you” : if you are brave enough to express this, you should also have the courage to leave immediately.
- “My ex would never have done that” : demanding that your current partner behave the same as your ex is an immature attitude that can have serious consequences.
- All other forms of vulgarity.
Micro-aggressions translate into concealed psychological violence, because the latter consists of small indirect verbal attacks. These attacks are exchanged on a daily basis and become a habit, so much so that they end up becoming part of the couple’s routine, to the detriment of the personal esteem of each member.
These are acts of mistreatment that leave no physical traces. In the event that they hurt us, we only discuss them with the people around us. We don’t realize it, until our relationship reaches a point of no return.
For example, phrases that can hurt include sarcasm such as “not a day goes by that you don’t bring me bad news” or “let me do it, you’re a disaster”, which are very damaging. And all the more so if there are also added “And if I tell you that, it’s because I love you”.
These words give rise to situations that occur daily and which are mistaken for signs of affection, but which always undermine the person affected, causing them to be very tired. These sentences hurt her little by little.
How to act?
Arguing is an art and is not synonymous with fighting. The manner of speaking, precisely, will have a great influence on the extent of the conflict. Empathy, respect, humility, and generosity are some of the values for avoiding uncomfortable situations. These phrases can steer the discussion in the right direction:
- “You are right in what you say”: this sentence is an opportunity to reach a point of agreement.
- “I feel (like that) when you say that”: starting with this confession allows us to open up to confess feelings and strengthen bonds of trust. Also, your partner can also express his feelings.
- “I’m sorry if this bothers you. Tell me exactly how you feel and that way I can understand you better… ”: so get out of the habit of guessing or trying to guess what your partner’s feelings or emotions are. Allow time to pause in the conversation, which can help improve understanding.
- “Why don’t we try to support each other?” : The honest approach invites both parties to end an argument in a positive way. Use gentle gestures and intonations, and prioritize physical contact and an understanding attitude.
In any relationship, and especially in a couple, there will always be arguments. To lead them in the right direction, it is necessary to apply a useful concept to all aspects of life: to take care of communication as well as possible and, of course, to avoid sentences that can hurt.