Let’s be honest. Long-distance relationships suck…
It inevitably has some small advantages (independence, more time with friends and family, less time with in-laws, etc…) but these advantages are really small compared to the rest. In short, it sucks!
My boyfriend lives more than 600km from my house, which means that I can’t ask him to have his lunch with me or to have a coffee at home when I want to.
But after two years of long distance relationship, I still have my heart that boils when I receive one of his texts and I take great pleasure in making a pretty card to send him. Even though I can’t be by her side every day, we have managed to keep our romantic relationship strong and healthy despite the distance.
I’ll be honest with you: Long distance relationships are hard on the heart, but there are a few ways you can not fall for it.
1. DO YOU TRUST ME?
We can never tell you enough: Trust yourself!
This is arguably easier said than done, but all long distance relationships that don’t have a solid foundation will cause one or the other to start to doubt and fall into paranoia. To avoid this, you need to trust your boyfriend or girlfriend.
The only way to gain someone’s trust is to be honest and open. Tell it as it is, don’t leave room for doubt.
2. SEND LOVE LETTERS
In the age of Facebook and WhatsApp, one might wonder when was your last handwritten letter… But for long-distance relationships, love letters are what work best.
It is extremely nice to receive a letter from your boyfriend or girlfriend in the mail. It shows that he took the time to write it down, to think about all the words he wrote. A love letter has more meaning than an SMS.
For even more effect, you can send a small gift with the love letter. Surprises are always pleasant and warm the heart.
3. SHOW HIM THAT YOU ARE THINKING OF HIM
Just because you live your love from a distance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t behave like “normal” couples.
You can also have small gestures and loving thoughts for each other. For example, my boyfriend orders pizzas or Chinese and asks for a delivery to my home without me knowing. But you can show that you are thinking of him by sending him a bouquet of flowers on Facebook or a simple text to say hello .
4. TURN ON YOUR WEBCAM
Being in a long-distance relationship in the 2000s is much easier than in the 90s. Why? Skype and webcams!
Don’t call each other on Skype every day to avoid falling into a routine and not knowing what to say to you. Your date on Skype should be the key moment you expect. With a webcam, you can see each other and share a laugh or a smile. Talking while looking at someone is also much more comfortable than talking to yourself while looking at a wall.
You can also use Snapchat to share your key moments of the day.
5. DON’T BE JEALOUS
Again, trust is extremely important. Don’t take control of his life. It can happen and with Facebook you can get really paranoid!
Don’t analyze all of his Facebook photos to see if a girl seems too close to him at night or if that girl posting on his wall is his girlfriend where he lives.
Trust him. He’s your boyfriend and if he tells you that he loves you and that you are the only one, that’s enough! Let him live his life.
6. TALK ABOUT THE FUTURE
Yes, I know, the future and serious discussions are scary. But it’s important to know if you’re on the same page. Are you both serious about this relationship? Are you both going to invest so much in trying to ensure that in the near future you can move and live together.
If you have the feeling that this long-distance relationship is going to stay “at bay” forever, maybe it’s important to quit to protect yourself before it’s too late.
Even if the money isn’t spilling out of your wallet, especially if you’re young, try to visit each other as often as possible, at least once every three months.
Visits are important because the thought of them approaching can lift your spirits in times when the distance can make you want to give up.
There is nothing that makes you happier than seeing your boyfriend waiting for you at the station with his smile and hugging you.
8. LIVE YOUR LIFE
The best way not to suffer too much from distance is to live your life in your city. Go out, meet your friends, play sports, take music or dance lessons. Even if your boyfriend is not at home when you get home, life here goes on. The busier you are, the less time you have to think about distance.