Our darling, he’s our darling: we adore him, and we wouldn’t change it for the world.
Still: we may love him more than anything, he has little quirks and habits that annoy us and that we hate to the highest point.
That he never folds the toilet seat
So that’s a problem that almost all women on Earth encounter: as soon as we go to our house to wee, the toilet seat is always up. And this even if we repeat all day long to our partner to cut it down after his passage. Either it’s genetic or it does it just to provoke us. In both cases, what annoys us …
That he be macho in front of his friends
In the intimacy, our partner is only love and tenderness, he gives us kisses and hugs. But as soon as one of his friends arrives, it’s stronger than him: he turns into Macho Man! He gets more distant, makes misogynistic little jokes, and acts embarrassed when we hug him. But as soon as his friend leaves, he becomes cute again. Pfff, too ridiculous!
That he marks his territory in the evening
Honey, he’s not jealous, eh, not at all. But nonetheless, when we are in the evening and a handsome blond comes to chat us, he can not help but come and mark his territory in a really heavy way. Either he introduces himself as our darling with a bad smile, or he throws a big shovel on us to cut the discussion short. What subtlety …
That he always put his dirty laundry next to or above the dirty laundry basket
And yet, he played basketball for 10 years, so it’s not because he can’t aim! But if we succeed perfectly in putting our dirty laundry inside the dirty laundry basket, it looks like he, a superior force forces him to put his underpants and his stinking socks always next to them, and in a ball. Mystery …
That he doesn’t wash on weekends
And what’s more, he’s looking for excuses to explain his filthy attitude, like “no no, it’s not because I’m too lazy to wash myself, it’s to let my skin rest”. You speak! And in addition, if we tell him that our friend Vanessa is going to pass (to put pressure on him), he will crack a “well you just have to go outside”. Grrrr!
That he refuses to take pills when he’s sick
Normal: he’s a real guy, and real guys, it heals the hard way, and certainly not with nasty medications! Suddenly, his little hay fever lasts a week instead of 48 hours, he leaves handkerchiefs all over the apartment, is too tired to do anything, and complains of having terrible migraines. Alala, guys …
That he never throws away the used toilet paper roll
When we finish a roll of toilet paper, we throw it away, and we put a new one instead. But when darling has just finished one, he leaves it lying around on the floor in the toilet (even if it’s a roll that dissolves in the toilet water!) Until it is thrown away and replaced. …
That he burps and farts in front of us
While at the beginning of our meeting, he would have preferred to die than appear with his fly open in front of us, now he no longer hesitates to burp or fart in a very loud (and smelly) way in front of us. According to him, it shows that he feels confident. In our opinion, that sounds just the end of romanticism in our relationship …
That he gives us culinary advice
Honey, the last time he touched a kitchen utensil was when we threw a ladle at him during our last argument. But hey, as soon as we simmer a small dish, he can’t help but go behind us to give us “wise advice” on the level of texture or seasoning. And there, we frankly want to kill him …
