Are you in denial? You usually want to believe that your ex will eventually come back.
Is that right or do you refuse to believe that the relationship is over for good? I will present to you below nine of the clearest signs that will give you reason to believe that your ex will eventually come back .
But before presenting the signs, stop for a moment and reflect on why you want to know about these signs.
Right now, a harmful psychological phenomenon is happening in your head, and looking for signs that your ex wants to come back or will definitely come back is an exercise that fuels this phenomenon.
This phenomenon is called denial of separation.
After all, if you’re sure your ex is going to get back to you, you have no reason to be serious about breaking up, right?
It could be that your ex is dating someone else, and if that’s the case for you, why worry about it if you know he’s going to break up with her and get back to you eventually?
Why suffer if it’s temporary?
Why worry about recognizing your mistakes, seeking to correct them and growing as a person, if you are sure your ex will return to the exact same person he left?
The phenomenon of denial is your mind trying hard to convince you that this separation is temporary.
That your ex boyfriend won’t really leave you.
He will come back to you after a while.
To avoid the pain of a breakup or the pain of striving to grow someone else, your mind wants you to believe that you don’t have to do anything.
Just relax and have fun.
Eventually, your ex will show up somehow and everything will be fine again.
Maybe your life is in a mess right now because of the breakup and your mind wants the easiest way for you to get organized.
The reality is, if your ex broke up with you , chances are he won’t get back on his own.
And even in the event that he comes back on his own, chances are good that the two of you will break up again.
“Is My Ex Coming Back? What Are The Chances Of My Ex Coming Back To Me Eventually?”
Asking these questions makes you look like you have no control over the situation or what will happen.
As if everything depended on your ex.
If your ex-boyfriend decides to get back together, you’ll be sitting there waiting for him.
Seriously, are you a teddy bear sitting on the couch that has nothing to do but wait for its owner to come back?
Here’s a suggestion: try to see the situation from a different perspective.
If you want your ex back, find out how you can be more proactive in attracting your ex boyfriend back instead of just sitting back and waiting for him to come back because you’ve seen all the signs on the internet that the relationship is back.
You are not dependent on others like a pet.
You are a human being whose actions and decisions affect the course of your life.
These actions and decisions will determine what happens to your love life in the coming months.
Don’t expect your ex to just come back.
There are many things you can do to increase your chances of getting back together with your ex and having a healthy relationship.
Even if that doesn’t happen, your actions and decisions will put you on another emotional level to move on and find a new, more amazing relationship.
Instead of asking yourself “Is my ex coming back?” or “Is this relationship coming back?” , ask yourself “What can I do to win my ex back and have a healthy relationship with him?” The answer is in this article.
That being said, let’s now move on to the signs that your ex will eventually get back to you.
In addition to the signs, you’ll also learn practical advice to maximize your chances of getting your ex boyfriend back on track.
Signs Your Ex Is Coming Back And The Relationship Has Come Back
1. You Have An “On/Off” Relationship
Sometimes they are together, sometimes they are not.
One of the biggest signs that your ex is going to get back together is if you have a relationship pattern of breaking up and getting back together after a short period of time.
This has happened twice or more.
It’s the famous On and Off relationship.
If you have a relationship pattern with your ex-boyfriend of breakup and reconciliation, then that pattern of behavior will likely continue .
In other words, your ex will come back.
In many cases, the person is so used to this pattern of behavior that they don’t even have to do anything to get their ex back.
She just goes on living life.
But when he comes back, it doesn’t mean you’ll be together permanently.
If there’s a lot of back and forth, guess what will happen after you get back together? Exactly, you’re going to finish again to continue the on and off pattern.
What to do to have a healthy relationship with your ex if you have an on and off relationship?
If this is the case for you, take the time off to reflect on the relationship in order to change the perspective.
Why can’t you two come out and have a healthy relationship?
Is it because the two of you want to reap different things from a relationship?
Is it because communication is not good between you? Is it because your ex or are you afraid of commitment?
By asking these questions, you will be able to identify the reasons for this on and off pattern of behavior.
That way, when your ex comes back, you won’t take him back and continue with the same pattern.
You will talk about the problems to find out if it is possible to solve them.
If your ex is also interested in having a healthy relationship with you, great.
Otherwise, it’s better to move on.
2. He Broke Up With You On The Spur Of The Moment.
In the heat of emotions and feelings, a person can act without thinking.
Maybe you guys had a big fight and one of the two parties got upset about something.
It’s common for an ex to make a hasty decision to break up with their partner , realize they made the wrong decision, and come back to talk to you when they’re calmer.
Of course, this will only happen if you and your ex didn’t have major chronic or serious relationship issues, it was a good relationship overall.
What to do if your ex broke up with you in the heat of the moment?
In the vast majority of cases where a person breaks up on the spur of the moment, the problem lies with one or both partner’s communication skills.
This is the main root cause of separation.
The best thing to do is try to fix things by improving communication.
Don’t leave reconciliation to chance.
When you feel ready and think you know how to communicate about relationships in a productive way, talk to your ex and talk about getting back together.
Keep in mind that in some cases there is nothing wrong with either partner and there is nothing you can do.
Sometimes, it’s simply a matter of incompatibility between the two of you.
If this is the case for you, it may be better to accept the end and seek to overcome the relationship.
3. He Said He Doesn’t Want To Break Up.
It may have happened that he broke up with you and said he doesn’t want this separation, but he has to honor the decision.
He thinks the breakup is “necessary,” even if it’s painful for him to be without you.
If your ex says he doesn’t want the breakup, chances are good he’ll end up getting back together with you.
He might even do his best to grow as a person to get you back.
However, if he can’t solve the problems he’s facing, he won’t come back.
What can you do if your ex broke up with you and said he didn’t want to?
The best way to deal with this situation is to try to understand the reasons that are making your ex stay away.
Does he think he has relationship problems that need to be fixed?
- Are they external circumstances?
- Is he having a personal problem?
- Was he unhappy in the relationship?
When you have an opportunity to talk to your ex, ask questions to find out why he decided to break up even though he didn’t want to.
If he opens up, pay close attention to him.
No judgments and criticisms and most importantly, no starting an ugly argument that will end in a fight all over again.
Don’t try to convince him to come back, you just need to listen to him.
Once you have a better understanding of what is causing your ex to act this way, reflect on those reasons for a few days.
- Is it something that can be resolved?
- Can circumstances be changed?
Can you communicate better to resolve issues?
As you work out solutions to disagreements, one thing that is absolutely necessary is to give your ex space during this time.
You don’t want to pressure and smother him at this point.
Give him the opportunity to miss you.
When you feel like the time apart is enough, reach out and talk about the things you’ve learned and how things are going to be different from now on.
It is important to remember that just because you are actively trying to resolve problems in the relationship does not necessarily mean that there is something wrong with you and that the problem is with you.
Be kind to yourself when talking about yourself and remember that we are all learning and growing as a person.
Making mistakes is absolutely normal, you learn from mistakes and become a better person.
Signs Your Ex Will Come Back If You Do The Right Things.
The signs below mean that you have a good chance of getting your ex back if you do the right things.
Also, find out what to do to increase your chances of your ex coming back to you .
4. You Had A Great Relationship.
Overall, the relationship has been very good for both of you.
If that was the case, chances are good that I’ll come back for the good things in the relationship.
A good relationship means you had great chemistry, a lot of trust in each other, and the time you spent together was fun and enjoyable.
You laughed, you had fun, you created good memories and you grew up together.
That doesn’t mean you never fought or argued.
All relationships, healthy or not, have fights and arguments.
Now, if fights and ugly arguments were things that happened all the time, then the relationship wasn’t particularly healthy.
What’s more, if there was any kind of abuse in the relationship, you might consider that it wasn’t good for either of you.
So if you didn’t have any of these and the relationship was generally good with your ex, then chances are good that you’ll get your ex back.
5. He Wants To Keep In Touch With You Or Your Friends And Family.
If your ex displays signs that he is making an effort to stay in touch with you, then chances are good that he is still interested in you and will eventually get back together.
These signs include:
- He keeps you on social media;
- He keeps one or all communication channels open;
- He strikes up a conversation with you via messages or calls;
- He shares random things with you;
- He does all this with one of his friends or family member.
However, this does not necessarily mean that it will automatically come back.
You may still need to do the right things to attract him back.
What to do if your ex wants to keep in touch with you?
If you feel like you need time away from your ex to get over, heal, and grow after your breakup, consider staying in zero contact with your ex .
Keeping in touch with your ex can end up preventing you from growing into the person you need to be in order to win him back.
6. He Still Has Strong Feelings For You.
This sign is very easy to spot.
If your ex still has strong attraction and strong feelings of passion and love for you, then he will eventually come back.
How to increase your chances of getting back with your ex if he still loves you?
Just because he still loves you doesn’t mean your ex is guaranteed to come back.
Remind yourself that something was wrong with the relationship, wrong enough for you to break up.
Unless you fix this, it may not be possible to have a healthy, lasting relationship with your ex.
7. It Opens When You Get In Touch.
With the right message, there’s a good chance your ex will want to talk to you again.
It may take him a few days to let his guard down and process your message.
Your ex will feel like they can talk to you openly if he gets an honest and vulnerable message after a while of no communication.
If he’s open to what you have to say, chances are good he’ll come back to you.
At this point, you just need to be patient and show that things are going to be different this time around.
Don’t forget to find out what you can do to fix the problems that led to the breakup before you text him.
8. Your Ex Wants To Meet You.
If he’s hinting at you that he wants to meet up with you, that’s another big sign that the relationship is back and he’ll come back to you eventually.
However, just because he wants to date you doesn’t mean he’s going to get back into a relationship with you.
A date with your ex is just the beginning of your new relationship with your ex.
You still need to make sure that you are better as a person, more self-confident, and more attractive.
Make sure you don’t do anything to turn him away.
What to do if your ex wants to date you?
To increase your chances of getting him back in a healthy relationship, note the following when you meet up with your ex:
a) Make sure you are not needy or desperate.
If you’re still desperate to win him back, don’t meet him in person.
Instead, ask him for more time and space and don’t make contact for another week or so.
During this time, work on your self-confidence and healing from the breakup.
b) Check that you have taken the time to reflect on the relationship patterns and the issues leading up to the breakup.
If you contributed to the problems, think about what you could do differently to improve (even if you don’t get back together with your ex).
There’s a good chance this topic will come up when you meet.
It helps a lot if you are mentally prepared for this matter.
c) Maintain good posture .
Dress well.
Smell good.
And show up with a smile on your face.
When your ex sees you, he should be attracted to you both physically and emotionally.
d) Have fun.
Don’t force a conversation.
And don’t talk about getting back together on the first date.
More details on what to do when you meet your ex can be found in this article:
9. You (Or Your Ex) Understand What Led To The Breakup And Whether It Can Be Fixed.
If you and your ex broke up, then I can say with absolute certainty that something was broken in your relationship.
In most cases, it’s a matter of figuring out what this thing was and how to fix it.
Remember, just because something was broken in the relationship, it doesn’t necessarily mean something is broken in you.
Sometimes a relationship ends for reasons you can’t control.
And if that’s happened to you, maybe it’s best to give up on your ex and focus on healing the breakup.
Many people don’t think deeply about the issues that lead to separation.
They just attribute the separation to something superficial.
For example, some people say, “My ex left me because he thinks he’s better than me. And I need to show him that I’m better than him.”
They also say, “My ex thinks she can find someone better than me. And I need her to know that I’m the best she’s ever going to get.”
Healthy relationships aren’t about this ego war of who’s better than who.
In fact, if you think so, then the reason the two of you broke up is probably the fact that you always thought of relationships in these superficial terms and never made an attempt to really connect with each other.
You have never made an attempt to understand each other and accept each other for who you are.
In reality, the reason for a breakup is usually deeper than these superficial reasons that most people think they are.
If you and your ex had a significant relationship at one point, then he’s not going to leave you for some superficial reasons.
Growth mindset versus fixed mindset
Having a growth mindset can help you learn from your mistakes and grow as a person.
He probably left you because something was missing, or because something was broken in the relationship.
And you need to find out what that was and also find out if you can fix it and have a healthy relationship with your ex in the future.
In many cases, this is communication.
And if you weren’t communicating with your ex in a way that made him feel understood and accepted, then that’s probably why this breakup happened.
And you need to learn how to communicate effectively to fix that.
It could have been other things besides communication as well.
Many people have issues that need a lot of self-introspection, self-improvement, or even therapy to resolve.
For example, your ex (or you) may have commitment issues that may have caused him to sabotage the relationship once things got serious.
To understand and resolve these commitment issues, they (or you) will need to understand the root cause of these issues and resolve them.
Therapy and a lot of introspection are usually needed.
If you understand the root cause of the breakup and know how to fix that root cause, then there is a good chance that your ex will come back.
Once your ex realizes that things have changed, he is very likely to want to get back together.
On the other hand, if your ex is aware of the root cause of the breakup and is actively trying to fix the issue (e.g., commitment issues), then there’s a good chance he’ll come back eventually when he feels he’s ready.
What Can You Do To Increase Your Chances Of Getting Him Back If You Understand The Cause Of The Breakup And How To Fix It?
It’s important to want to solve the problem for your own growth and not just to want your ex back.
You should be doing this because you think it will help you become a better person and improve all of your relationships.
You shouldn’t be doing this just to get your ex back.
For example, if communication was a problem in the relationship, it makes sense to want to learn how to communicate better so you don’t make the same mistakes in your next relationship (even if it’s not with your ex).
However, if your ex just wanted you to be someone you’re not (say, a party person), and you force yourself to become a party person just to get your ex back, it doesn’t make sense.
It doesn’t make you a better person and it won’t necessarily help you, even if you don’t get your ex back.
To increase your chances of getting your ex back in a healthy relationship, make sure what you’re doing makes you a better person.
This way, everything you do or say to your ex will be genuine and authentic.
And your new relationship will have much stronger foundations than before.
Conclusion
Wondering if your ex will eventually come back or if the relationship will come back is a natural reaction to a breakup.
Your mind is experiencing heartbreak of separation (denial) and wants to believe that this separation is temporary.
Feeding your denial is unhealthy and doesn’t help you get your ex back and keep him.
Instead, you should focus on what you can actively do to become a better person and have a healthy, fulfilling relationship (with or without your ex).
Your ex might come back… Or your ex might never come back.
Only with the right attitude, the right mindset and a little willpower can you be sure that you will find the love and happiness you deserve.
You can be sure that your next relationship will be an amazing one.
Whether with your ex or someone else.
