Decoding Narcissistic Text Messages: 13 Examples and How to Respond

Narcissistic behavior is on the rise, and it is not uncommon for one to encounter such individuals in their daily lives. Whether it’s a friend, family member, or a romantic partner, their constant need for validation, attention, and admiration can be exhausting and emotionally draining. One of the ways in which narcissists try to control and manipulate others is through their text messages. Here are some common examples of narcissistic text messages and how to respond to them.

  1. The Guilt-Trip Text: “I can’t believe you’re not here. I really needed you.”

Response: “I’m sorry you’re feeling that way, but I have other commitments right now.”

  1. The Flattery Text: “You’re so amazing. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Response: “Thank you for your kind words, but I don’t feel comfortable with that level of praise.”

  1. The Gaslighting Text: “You’re overreacting. I never said that.”

Response: “I’m certain that’s what you said, and I don’t appreciate being told otherwise.”

  1. The Victim Text: “I can’t believe you would do this to me. I trusted you.”

Response: “I understand you’re upset, but I didn’t do anything to betray your trust.”

  1. The Love-Bombing Text: “I love you so much. You’re the only one who truly understands me.”

Response: “I appreciate your affection, but I need space and time to process my own feelings.”

  1. The Threatening Text: “If you don’t do what I want, I’ll never talk to you again.”

Response: “That’s not a healthy way to communicate. Let’s talk about this calmly and find a solution together.”

  1. The Pity-Party Text: “I’m so alone and nobody cares about me.”

Response: “I’m here for you, but it’s not fair to expect me to make up for everyone else’s absence in your life.”

  1. The Blame-Game Text: “This is all your fault. If you had listened to me, we wouldn’t be in this mess.”

Response: “It’s not helpful to play the blame game. Let’s work together to find a solution.”

  1. The One-Upping Text: “That’s nothing compared to what I’ve been through.”

Response: “I understand you’ve been through a lot, but that doesn’t diminish my own experiences and feelings.”

  1. The Dismissive Text: “Whatever, it’s not a big deal.”

Response: “It may not be a big deal to you, but it is important to me and I would appreciate if you could acknowledge that.”

  1. The Boundary-Violating Text: “I know you said you didn’t want to talk about this, but I just can’t help myself.”

Response: “It’s important to respect each other’s boundaries. Let’s discuss this when we’re both ready.”

  1. The Passive-Aggressive Text: “I guess I’ll just have to deal with this on my own.”

Response: “I’m here for you if you need support, but I can’t read your mind. Please be direct with me.”

  1. The Insulting Text: “You’re so stupid. I can’t believe you don’t understand this.”

Response: “That’s not a respectful or productive way to communicate. Let’s take a break and try again later.”

In conclusion, dealing with narcissistic text messages can be challenging, but it’s important to remember to set boundaries and stand up for yourself. Don’t let their behavior control your emotions and responses. Practice self-care and seek support from trusted friends or professionals if needed.