You already had something going on with this woman, and it was almost the great love between you… you thought. But suddenly you noticed something that disappointed you: she doesn’t know what she wants!
Because overnight she is coldly distancing herself from you even though you got along so well on the date.
Now she’s avoiding you. She responds less, cancels meetings, or even interrupts contact.
When you confront her, she presses on and explains that she’s not sure how she feels about you. She doesn’t know if she wants a relationship and has to think about it all over again.
You feel the first headache because of this rejection, you get confused.
The agonizing uncertainty wears him down, as does the fear of losing him. Because a partnership is now totally in the stars and you’d like to know where you are.
So what should you do in this situation?
In order for you to properly react to their antics, we first have to clarify one thing:
Why doesn’t a woman know what she wants?
The world of women is a real mystery to us men… just completely unpredictable.
Yesterday (almost) the great love, today she changes her mind and says she doesn’t want a relationship, but she still likes you.
Then we sat for hours at home and racked our brains over his strange and changeable behavior. Why the hell is she reacting like this?
If a woman doesn’t know what she wants, there can be many reasons:
- She is still not over her ex-boyfriend or is reuniting with him for a new version of their relationship.
- She met another man and now she has to choose between you.
- Your best friend thinks you’re not “right” for her.
- She needs more time because she’s not sure how she feels about you.
- You showed a certain behavior that made you unattractive in their eyes.
- As you get to know each other better, she realizes that the two of you are not going to get along well together. Perhaps, saying that she doesn’t know what she wants, she wants to give you a soft basket, so that you can slowly isolate yourself from you.
- She feels constrained and pressured to enter into a relationship with you and therefore seeks distance first.
- In a previous relationship, she was hurt by her boyfriend and now, because of this bad experience, she cannot get involved with a new man.
- She wants to enjoy her freedom as a single or is generally unable to relate and is afraid to get involved in a partnership.
- She has other issues in her life that are making a relationship impossible.
Here are 5 tips to help
The question now is: what can you do to get the girl to stay with you and decide on a relationship with you?
If the woman doesn’t know what she wants, these tips will definitely help you:
1. Never ask about a relationship
I know many men who have a date or two with a woman, fall head over heels in love with her, and want nothing more than to be with her.
It’s actually okay, after all, you guys have fun together.
However, at some point, some guys get impatient because they really want to clarify. “Shut up”, as the saying goes.
They confess their great love, and ask annoying questions like “What is it between us now?” And they try to force the loved one into a relationship with all their strength during courtship.
None of this is attractive to women because it creates incredible pressure. That’s why she keeps her distance from you!
There are several reasons for your discomfort:
- She doesn’t know what she wants because it’s too early for her, so she feels taken aback by you.
- A relationship ONLY develops emotionally, that is, through the feeling of love, connection, and togetherness – and not by being formally stipulated as a “contract”.
- The woman also feels that you want to hold her to you through a partnership, for fear of losing her again. This shows a lack of self-esteem because you don’t trust your natural male attraction to keep it with you.
- Your attachment is a warning sign to them that you may be a person who will later restrict them, even more, when they are together as a couple.
So don’t broach the topic of “relationship”, but simply enjoy time together with her without restricting her freedom.
Also, you don’t need to find a name for what you have with each other. For some people, it creates a great deal of expectation pressure, which leads to acute escape reflexes!
2. Don’t put her under pressure
Otherwise, you shouldn’t stress her out if you notice any signs that she doesn’t know what she wants.
So, no nagging questions about why she’s acting so “strange” and what’s going on right now. No accusations and abuse. Also, she doesn’t set a deadline for making a decision.
Also, stop constantly communicating with her via WhatsApp/SMS or asking for a date, even if she says she needs some time for herself.
All these writings, discussions, and situations ensure that the woman continues to feel harassed by you.
Especially if she’s afraid of attachment, is emotionally unstable, or insecure about the feelings she feels for you, it will push her away and just pull away from you.
So you get the exact opposite of what you really want.
The opposite applies again: as soon as you let go of the reins, maintain the necessary distance and release the pressure, you give her air to breathe.
Always give her absolute freedom to choose what to do – it will be best for her.
This makes you more interesting to her again, so she’ll automatically look for you again.
3. How to give her enough space
If you’re already in love and really want clarity about a relationship, it’s not so easy to let go and give the other the space they need.
If you feel the same way, I have a simple but effective formula for you:
Don’t you know what you want? Give her the freedom to make her decision by giving yourself freedom!
What exactly does this mean? Very easily:
Don’t fixate on this woman like the rabbit on the snake, but free yourself. Sometimes you can’t get in touch with her for a while, you don’t need to write to her three times a day.
Instead, distract yourself from the persistent longing for love, for example, with hobbies, sports, travel, and good friends.
If she really dumps you, there are also plenty of other women you can meet. Hopefully.
This will help you distance yourself a little bit from her so she doesn’t feel pressured anymore and can think in peace.
And who makes himself rare as a man, always arouses interest in the other person, because he will miss you and want to spend more time with you again!
4. Accept what you cannot change
Women are very emotional beings, much stronger than us men. Because they are guided by their feelings, they often exhibit changeable behavior.
For us, rational guys, the only impression that often arises is, “She doesn’t know what she wants!” So we (in our minds) pick daisies with the saying: “She loves me, she doesn’t love me… ”
However, this emotionality in the female world also means that we cannot logically explain female behavior with all the mood swings.
So just accept this psychological discovery that women are sometimes moody like the weather, which is so hard to influence.
You also don’t know if she suddenly finds another man she likes better or if she has strong relationship fears that block her.
This is the constant uncertainty that we men have to live with.
Therefore, you can only hold back and trust that she will be sufficiently attracted to you and that, in the end, she will commit to you of her own volition.
5. Attracting women in a masculine way
If she doesn’t know what she wants, it could also be a sign that her trust in you isn’t strong enough.
As a man, you are the one who has to flirt with her and attract her on a date.
But you also need to maintain their desire for you in the long run and master this exciting game of proximity and distance.
And you have to be solid as a rock, the shoulder to lean on, to give her the stability and security she needs.
This is the only way you can make her fall in love with you and feel emotions so strong that she wants to live in a relationship with you forever.