How to stop being jealous, insecure, and possessive

There are many ways to end a relationship: excessive jealousy and insecurity are the most common. When the sting of doubt is buried in a woman, she is capable of poisoning herself so much that she can throw her entire relationship off a cliff without realizing it.

Jealousy makes you sick and makes you see ghosts where there are none. That will necessarily affect the couple’s relationship and the freedom of their boyfriends, who will most likely end up leaving, feeling suffocated.

Without trust, a relationship fades, and if the boyfriend has also done nothing to cause jealousy, it is unfair that he should tolerate unjustified scenes against him.

If you have already lost stable relationships due to not knowing how to control your jealousy, or if your current relationship is in danger on the tightrope, do not miss these 7 suggestions to overcome your insecurity.

1. Start believing him

Trust is the cornerstone of any relationship. It is understandable that your boyfriend will feel insulted if you doubt his word and his love with the slightest action.

What if instead of putting stories together in your head, you believe what he tells you? Even if something inside you leads you back to doubts, start to reprogram your mind and get used to taking his word as true.

Little by little you will notice that he will feel confident enough to tell you about his activities because he will not be afraid of your outbursts of unjustified jealousy.

If you love him, why not believe him when he tells you that he feels the same way?

2. Don’t compare yourself to others

Your doubts are likely to come from yourself. Maybe if you don’t understand why he likes you, it’s because you’re the one who doesn’t feel that kind of love and respect for yourself.

There will always be more attractive women, smarter, with more money, taller, it is true. But if your boyfriend is with you, it is because he feels that there is something more valuable and important that unites them.

If you are obsessed with the idea of ​​comparing yourself to someone else, it is no longer about jealousy, but about low self-esteem. And this will lead you to constantly think negatively.

Understand: he dates you because he wants you to be his girlfriend. No other!

Change your attitude, let yourself be loved, and avoid being the one who pushes you to find another partner just because of your own fears.

Don’t let your mind limit you with inferiority beliefs. Your boyfriend saw in you a human, funny, intelligent woman, with whom he can connect emotionally, so stop comparing yourself.

3. Assume that he can leave you

It is important to understand that not all jealousy stems from personal insecurity. You may have very high self-esteem and then feel jealous or fear, not because you are not worth enough, but because you could lose the person.

If you think that you are too important, that you deserve everything and everyone’s admiration, it can be difficult to understand that in his life there are other interests and priorities with which you should share it.

Remember that your partner is not a property, but a human being. You have no right to play with him.

To love another person you must be prepared to understand and respect that they have free will and that you should not subordinate it to your whims.

Despotic, uncontrolled, and selfish attitudes on your part will damage the relationship. When you least expect it, you will begin to attack him, to feel anger and desire to control him like a puppet.

If instead of seeing him as a possession you cannot live without, you start to manage the relationship from the basis of trust and security, you will also understand that he is free to be by your side or to leave when it seems convenient.

Just ask yourself: what would I do if I didn’t live with this man? Imagine the scenario in which he came to leave you and reflect on how you would continue your life. If you cannot see it, then you must work on yourself and your own interests so as not to be a dependent person.

If he is with you, it must be out of love, not because he is afraid of your jealous reactions. The relationship should be based on balance and not on constant doubts.

4. Don’t make him jealous

Be careful with this point. If you live in jealousy, it is very dangerous that as a kind of punishment you start flirting with others to try to make your partner feel the same as you do.

Instead of doing good, you are going to entangle your relationship and distance it from your life. It is a very ironic decision because you would be doing exactly the same thing that you fear that he will do to you, and unconsciously you could cause that infidelity that causes so much fear to occur.

If your boyfriend has given you reasons to feel jealous that is his responsibility and it is reprehensible to him, so do not lower yourself to his status as unfaithful only to pay him with the same coin.

Your dignity is not negotiated, it is better to turn around with your head held high than to seek to hurt him.

5. Stop your imagination

Imagination is a powerful resource if you use it to do good, to feel happy, to write a book, or to find solutions to your problems.

But it can be devastating if you let her free to create negative stories involving your partner.

Most jealousy is not real, that is, it has no basis. Rather, they have been produced by alienating feelings and thoughts that invade the person, and are installed in such a way that they convince you that it is real.

Imagine this: one night your partner stays late at the office and, instead of understanding that he is overworked, you start to doubt at home, imagine that he is actually in a bar having a few drinks with another person, enjoying himself.

While he is really working, those thoughts surround you, fill you with rage because you feel everything that could happen if it were a true lie and infidelity. You get dizzy from negativity for hours, and when he comes home tired from the office, World War III begins at home.

Look for logical reasons for what makes you jealous, and remember that what you imagine is not necessarily reality.

Just don’t lose control, start trusting your boyfriend and force yourself to stay in positive thoughts.

6. Give him freedom

When a bird is caged, it will seek to fly more forcefully, rather than conform to confinement.

If your boyfriend wants to go out with his friends, enjoy a night without you, allow it. He has the right to have his own space and that does not mean that he does not love you or respect you less.

If you forbid things to him, with more energy he will want to do them. This is how human nature works, to go against what they forbid us.

Even if you go out with him or accompany him to a party, let him talk to his friends, dance with other women. Remember that he may not even see them as half as attractive as your imagination has convinced you they are. To respect his freedom is to truly love him.

7. Find relaxing activities

Close your eyes and imagine each of the situations that have made you angry and feel afraid and jealous. It is time to change those thoughts and project yourself towards happiness.

Just as he has the right to be free, you also have the right to free yourself from those thoughts that torment you and fill you with fear.

Start practicing yoga and meditation, great ways to relax, nurture yourself as a human being, and internalize new patterns of behavior. I assure you that the relationship will improve as much as you.

Although it seems contradictory, jealousy is a form of love that, instead of building, destroys what is most loved.

Whenever you think you will feel jealous, take a deep breath and try to put yourself in your boyfriend’s shoes, and what he experiences with your constant mistrust, try to understand his emotions and frustrations.

If your boyfriend is by your side, enjoy his company. Don’t mess up a charming moment with accusing questions, in which no matter how hard he defends himself, you pressure him and blame him excessively.

Be optimistic and trust him! That way he will not mistrust the relationship.

Tell us, what is the craziest thing you’ve done out of jealousy? If you liked this information, do not forget to share it on your social networks so that it can help more people.

And we hope to be useful to you through the comments and doubts section, which we will gladly read and respond to.