We hate to break the bank, but… One of the most common discussions I see happening about dating and relationships these days is about the lack of elements of a real date for two people to really get to know each other and initiate a romantic connection.
Last-minute messages to “go out” or invitations to “have a drink” seem sufficient.
That said, there is a time and place for everything.
Sometimes the most casual encounter is appropriate, but the amount of effort a man puts into planning a date is directly proportional to his interest in the woman he is courting.
Unfortunately, as more and more casual encounters are accepted more and more, people (especially men) make less and less effort, because why bother if women are settling for less, right?
Our generations are almost losing track of what a real date is like, but if you want to build a genuine, lasting relationship with someone, you need to show that you are willing to do so, and not settle for anything less than a date. truth.
Here are eight signs that you’re going on a “real date,” not a chance encounter that’s already doomed to be nothing.
1. He Really Treats It Like A Date.
This is so basic I didn’t even want to say it, but these days I have to.
Meeting for a drink is not a date.
Having a coffee is not a date.
A last-minute message inviting her to join him with his group of friends is not a date.
Using truly appropriate words and properly inviting a woman on a date is the first step in making it a real date.
2. The Man Pick Up The Woman.
I will never understand the “Want to meet me there?” mentality.
If I’m interested enough in a woman to ask her out on a date, you better believe I’m going to drive to her house to pick her up.
If the man is going to dinner and the woman is “out of the way,” he should either find somewhere within a reasonable driving distance of her house or be prepared to make the necessary driving to her house, then to the restaurant, go back to her house and then home again.
That being said, in the world of online dating and random hookups, a woman may often not feel comfortable giving her address unless you’ve already built up adequate trust.
The important thing is that he offers and if you prefer to meet him at the appointed place, great.
3. There Is A Real Structure For The Night.
He certainly doesn’t need to spend hundreds of dollars or plan multiple events overnight.
The idea here is to really reflect on the experience the two of you are going to share.
If you’re going to dinner, for example, don’t show up at a restaurant and expect to get a table.
He’ll have to figure out what kind of food you like, make a reservation and choose a good table.
Regardless of the plan, there must be a plan.
4. You Two Really Care About Your Looks.
A date is not the time for careless clothes.
Taking the time to compose yourself and putting a real effort into your appearance shows respect for yourself and the person you’re dating.
Saying, “This is who I am, take it or leave it” is a great way to never get a second date.
Not to mention, we should want to look good for this person, whether it’s our first date or our 100th date.
The second we stop trying hard for the person is the second things start to go wrong.
If one of the two starts out that way, it’s safe to say the romance is doomed from the start.
5. The Man Pays The Bill.
When friends go out, they split the bill.
When you’re on a date, the man pays the bill.
The entire account.
There are many ways a woman can reciprocate if she wants to.
She can pay for parking, get a round of drinks, get snacks at the show he bought the tickets for, whatever.
But when the bill arrives for dinner, he shouldn’t let you near him and not accept your offer to split it.
If he thinks paying for the date is about the money, he’s wrong.
6. Cell Phones In Pocket And Purse.
If the person you’re dating doesn’t give you enough attention to make you forget about all your Instagram notifications for a few hours, then you’ve been dating the wrong person.
7. There Is Some Kind Of Chivalry Involved.
Whether it’s opening doors, pulling out chairs, or any other small acts of kindness that signify romantic interest in a woman – these are small actions that show you that he’s actually interested enough to go the extra mile for you.
8. The Man Takes You Home Safely.
No, you probably won’t need him to walk you home.
Yes, you lived a long time without him by your side.
But none of those things mean you should part as the night wears off.
If he picked you up at home, he should later make sure you get home safely too.
Whether you’re walking, driving, or taking a cab, it’s imperative to end the night with a positive feeling that the date was perfect.
Things can get dangerous at night for both men and women, and making sure you get home safely will only reassure you that he cares and is there for whatever you need, especially if you live alone.