Do we choose our partner based on our personality type? It is possible that, until now, you have never thought of this, or maybe it is something that is essential for you.
Anyway, we are going to present to you the 4 identified personalities around which emotional relationships are based.
The 4 types of personalities in love
We have to admit it, sometimes we fall in love with the person we least expected. The one that corresponds least to our personality, but which nevertheless completes us.
Other times, we live in relationships that do not match us, and that only bring us bad luck. Why is this happening? Why are we drawn to such toxic personalities?
As the saying goes, opposites attract and there is little theoretical explanation for this.
One of the last books published on the subject of choosing a romantic partner is called “Why him?” Why her? (Why him? Why her?) By Rutgers University anthropologist Helen Fisher.
This very informative book defines 4 major types of personality that are found in all relationships. We will present them to you in this article:
1. The explorer personality
These people see love as an adventure. They are impulsive, autonomous, very curious and often seize the present moment. We are going to see some of their main personality axes:
- Tendency to always seek new things, new experiences.
- Propensity to take risks without worrying about the consequences.
- They are very spontaneous people.
- They have a lot of energy.
- They are curious, creative, and optimistic.
- Their main quality is their flexibility, their openness.
2. The directive personality
Directive people are not necessarily “dominant” in absolute terms. He’s a very analytical personality type, who puts logic and common sense above all else. Very balanced people.
- They are very determined people and very sure of themselves.
- They often control their emotions very well.
- They have the facility to go straight to the heart of things and say what they want.
- These people like that everything is in its place and that everything is done according to the rules of the art. In short, they are perfectionists.
3. The constructive personality
The main values of builders are family, friends, and union with their own people. They are serene and sociable people, very peaceful, who do not take any risks.
- They are quiet people, sure of themselves but without pretension.
- They are stubborn.
- They feel comfortable with traditional things and established rules.
- They have facilities to develop and manage social networks.
4. The negotiating personality
Negotiators are expressive, empathetic, and idealistic. They often have very sensitive but also very imaginative profiles, and often have a great open-mindedness. They are in need of deep feelings and their emotional needs to be met.
- These people are able to go beyond appearances, they are naturally intuitive.
- Imaginative and sensitive.
- They are a compassionate , open-minded, and great company.
- They are idealistic and altruistic personalities.
- They express their emotions, they do not contain or conceal them.
- They are very good at communication, at building relationships.
Which personalities are compatible with each other?
According to Helen Fisher’s study, the results on the happiest and longest-lasting couples based on their personality types are as follows:
1. Explorers form good couples with explorers
Understandably, people who seek emotion and a relationship based on passion, get along well with like-minded people. If you are more of a negotiator or builder, you will find it difficult to view this spontaneity or this way of living in the present moment positively, because you prefer stability and family values.
According to the author, these are the most explosive couples, who are constantly going through ups and downs, who separate and reconcile, who love each other intensely but who can get bored as soon as they have it. they want.
2. Builders form good couples with builders
They value family, meetings with friends, time spent with their loved ones, and cannot imagine a future without children, surrounded by stability, calm, and control over all parameters of their life. No strong emotions or risks, only calm and security.
3. Managers get along well with negotiators
Many of the couples who establish stable and satisfying relationships have these profiles. Analytical, directive, and perfectionist people are happy alongside sensitive, empathetic, and emotional people.
It’s a good way to complement each other. Analysis and objectivity in the face of the intuitive, the sensitive. The two seem to attract each other in order to fill their gaps, to find in the other a way to be totally fulfilled.
Obviously, this is not absolute. But, the author’s intention is to give us an example of the kind of personalities people have who maintain lasting and fulfilling relationships.
You have to take into account the fact that if you are an emotional, sensitive person, looking for stability and a peaceful daily life, you will not form an ideal couple with someone who has a more exploratory personality.
It is possible that once the passion passes, your relationship gives way to disillusionment.