Relationship issues: what to do when arguments become common?

Not every relationship problem has to spell the end. But you must take a negative mood seriously. Do you have the feeling that your partnership is no longer working well? Do you miss the euphoria and joy shared from those early days? Has the tenderness and intimate union in which both felt at ease and at home ended?

It’s best to quickly find out what the crux of your relationship is. But how can you recognize relationship problems? Take the relationship problems test and find out.

Four signs of relationship problems

Are you reluctant to return home to your partner and would you rather start something with friends rather than an activity for two? So you better go in and do a relationship test. Pay attention to emotions in your partner, as many reveal relationship problems. The clear signs are:

  1. Disrespect:
    It doesn’t just start when you no longer value the other person’s opinion. There is also no mutual respect in relationships where one partner thinks they must first create the other or treat the other permanently. This behavior creates an unhealthy dynamic, which in turn leads to more relationship problems.
  2. Low willingness to work it out:
    How can you recognize a relationship problem? If your partner often talks about changing jobs, moving, or even breaking up – and doesn’t involve you in the decision-making process – it shows that he’s not ready to work things out.
  3. Lost attention:
    If one partner regularly shows misconduct, whether in their own four walls or when flirting with others in public, it can have an impact on how much the other respects them. Solving this relationship problem is not easy. After all, respect and a loving attitude are always based on the respect shown for the person and their needs.
  4. Physical Distance:
    If relationship problems increase to an increasing burden, the couple will sooner or later distance themselves physically if they are not in a long-distance relationship and are already away from each other most of the time due to their conditions. Once that point is reached, it’s time to tackle the relationship crisis.

These are the most common relationship problems for couples

Each relationship is unique. However, the same relationship problems often arise in different partnerships. A distinction must be made here between harmless everyday problems and serious aspects that arouse discontent in an unhappy relationship. But what exactly are they?

Four everyday life relationship problems

  • High Expectations:
    If one expects too much from the other, it quickly leads to disappointment and excessive pressure. The emotional cocktail easily discharges into arguments and relationship stress. If this happens frequently, it can become a permanent problem.
  • Lateness: 
    It’s hard to believe, but if you or your partner are regularly late — and here we mean more than the justifiable five minutes — the other person perceives this as disrespectful in the long run and interprets it as disinterest.
  • Ex-Partner Stories:
    “Well, my ex always did it this way!” – No woman wants to hear that phrase. The reverse is also true for men. No one wants to see their ex’s dark shadow hanging over their relationship or be subliminally compared to their ex. So it’s no wonder that this is one of the most common reasons for relationship problems.
  • Over sharing:
    Do you talk to your friends about everything, including personal concerns that your partner confides in you? So you shouldn’t be surprised if this results in unpleasant scenes. It is better to resolve this relationship problem quickly. Because it attacks one of the most important pillars of partnership: trust.

Four serious relationship problems

  • Jealousy:
    This problem is one of the biggest burdens of a partnership. Because it affects not only the jealous but also the person who is exposed to it. A little jealousy – if justified – is perfectly normal in a relationship. But a morbid love related to this turns out to be a difficult relationship problem to solve.
  • Emotional Blackmail  :
    “You don’t love me at all!” – At first this phrase seems like a silly joke if we apply it to everyday conflicts. But there is a serious accusation in it that causes emotional blackmail and can be responsible for serious relationship problems.
  • Lack of communication  :
    Do you find it difficult to speak freely with your partner about intimate thoughts? So you’ve just recognized a serious relationship problem. Because a functioning relationship fundamentally depends on a couple’s open communication. If this is not available, interpersonal relationships wither, and everyday life and superficiality find their way.
  • Fraud:
    For some, fraud only begins when there is already intimacy with a third person. For others, just an SMS with flirty words to the colleague. Cheating has many facets, but they are all similar in one crucial fact: those who feel cheated can no longer trust unconditionally. And that, in turn, leads to a major relationship problem.

Solving Long-Term Relationship Problems – This is How You’ll Do It

Now that you’ve taken the relationship problems test and know how to spot the signs, we come to another key point: how best to approach the situation. Here, too, the options vary, depending on the severity of the problem and its consequences.

Solve relationship problems of everyday life

A healthy mix of communication, understanding, and fairness is needed to get rid of every day disputes that don’t jeopardize the relationship but become a problem in frequency and quantity. When it comes to less serious relationship issues, unbiased communication with your partner works wonders. Try to understand each other and be fair during an argument.

Tip:   Approach the problem with “I” phrases rather than accusing “you” statements, such as “I feel bad when I always have to wait” rather than “You are always late.”

Solve serious relationship problems

Both partners often find it even more difficult to communicate openly when stressful relationship issues are evident. “Should I separate?”. Fronts are hardened, and no one is willing to give in. They are not good prerequisites for a constructive discussion or willingness to work on the relationship.

In such cases, couples therapy under the guidance of a trained therapist can help. He knows how to successfully conduct a conversation.

Couples therapy with a qualified therapist should be considered, among other things, if serious issues put a strain on the relationship and mutual trust between the partners may also be at risk or undermined. In the therapeutic setting, a balance is drawn “on neutral ground” and the existing problem is examined from all sides. In this way, the real and deep causes of conflicts can be recognized, analyzed and then addressed. The basic requirement for successful couples therapy is always that both partners have the desire and willingness to work on themselves and the relationship.

Relationship problems: how to overcome them

In short, it can be said: Be on the lookout for signs of relationship problems in your partner, such as disrespect, disrespect, lack of commitment, and physical distance. If you notice any of these signs, take your time and take the “relationship problem test”. Review your behavior together and analyze the different arguments you have. What are they about? Are they everyday things or are they serious issues you struggle with? Open and constructive communication can often work wonders. If the fronts are already hardened, a couples therapist can help you and your partner smooth things over and have a happy relationship again.