Who does not remember those butterflies that kept flying in our stomachs and gave us all kinds of feelings and emotions every time we saw the one we liked? Yes, we are talking about that innocent first love. That early romance that usually happens during high school and seems to be the one that, for most teens, will last forever. Well, the stark truth is that for most people, that won’t turn out to be true. However, this does not mean that teenage love should not be appreciated and encouraged if it is healthy and makes the people involved feel good.
There will be times when those involved will feel hurt, and this is unavoidable, as much as parents may wish it were not. All teens should be aware of the fact that tears and disappointments will eventually follow, but it will not be the end of the world. It is just one step towards maturity and a very necessary one. That’s why, in this article, we’ll talk about some teen love tips for romance and early dating so you know what to expect, whether you’re the teen involved or the parent watching you closely.
A list of the top 10 love tips for teens in a new relationship
1. Dating only if it’s mutual
If there was a list of rules regarding teen dating, this would probably be the one written in gold. At this age, it is easy to create a false and ideal image of a person and lie to them. That is why it is so important to check reality and start dating only if the feelings are mutual. Trust us (because you know, experience) when we say that unrequited love is the worst thing that can happen to you when you’re a teenager. It can seriously damage your self-esteem and could harm you in the long run.
2. Your first love probably won’t be your last
This is definitely the definition of harsh reality, but as a teenager, you should probably be aware of the fact that this first love, or even some after it, is probably not the last. Teens often make the mistake of thinking that eternal happiness is the person they love and often end up extremely disappointed. People’s life and goals change. Sometimes even their personalities change and there is nothing we can do about it. So even if this first love of yours seems magical, take it with a grain of salt. Call it a defense mechanism if you want.
3. “Puppy love” is a real thing!
On the other hand, don’t be fooled by those people who don’t believe in “puppy love”, or that innocent first love. Usually, there are real feelings there, even if they come from inexperience and naivety. What most teens feel is not a minor version of “real love”! It is pure and happens overnight. Still, the previous point still holds true: prepare for it to fade and consider the consequences. This brings us to the next point.
4. Physical intimacy, but don’t mistake it for pure love
Once you’re in a relationship, physical intimacy can become your next big interest, and it’s absolutely normal! However, you should know that while it can be a nice thing to do, it would be a big mistake to mistake it for love. Yes, making love feels like a kind of love, even if it is physical, but there are many cases where the two of you have nothing in common. This type of physical intimacy will not satisfy either you or your need to be loved and offer love. So be careful, especially if you’ve just started dating someone.
5. Take good care of yourself and prepare for the consequences
And by that, we mean wearing protection! It is not just the fact that you may not be ready to have a child during high school, but also the risk of contracting various transmitted diseases. Therefore, the best idea would be to take good care of yourself, even if you blindly trust your partner, which you definitely shouldn’t at this age. Also, some of the consequences include heartbreak and disappointment as well, which you may also not be ready to face once the deal is closed. Therefore, think carefully before starting a new relationship, especially if you are a teenager.
6. Avoid pressure!
Nowadays, feeling pressure from many places, such as society or friends, can seriously damage your personality. The thing is, no matter how much others pressure you to start a relationship or have physical intimacy, don’t do it until you’re completely ready! Most teens say that, at one point, they’ve been pressured to do something they didn’t want to do just to be like everyone else. They always regretted it afterward. So why would you want to be like everyone else when you can be special and wait until you are sure of what you want?
7. Be discreet and ask your partner to respect
Social media has taken our world by storm. However, it is both a blessing and a curse. When it comes to relationships, it would probably be best to avoid posting every detail of your young love life on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, etc. The idea here is to be as low-key as possible because, at this age, other people might get too interested in your relationship. This is not something that you or your partner can benefit from, most of the time. So asking your partner for the same discretion would be great.
8. Realize when things don’t work out
As beautiful as this newfound love is, there are always times when things don’t go well between the two of you. That is the right time to be a mature person and let go. Don’t hold on to a person or relationship if you feel like it might get you nowhere. Also, you shouldn’t be afraid of being a little selfish. Finding someone better is not frowned upon, but a way to protect yourself and evolve. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise!
9. Know when / if you are really in love
Teenagers are often in love with the very idea of love and don’t realize that what they might be feeling has nothing to do with it. Sometimes it is a crush or a personal projection of a perfect relationship. There is nothing wrong with being in love with love, but be careful and try to distinguish when or if you are really in love. Not doing this could hurt you in the end and completely change your perspective when it comes to relationships.
10. Do only the things you are prepared for
Unfortunately, the opposite of this happens far too often, especially when it comes to young girls. They are tempted to date older men who may pressure them to do certain things they are not ready for, such as having a physical intercouse too soon. So a good idea would be to try to surround yourself with people close to your age and choose an eventual partner accordingly. This is a tricky situation, but one that you should definitely be aware of if you don’t want to be disappointed.
3 things to keep in mind for teens caught in a love triangle
1. Listen to your heart and instinct
First of all, every teenager who is caught in a love triangle should know that following his heart is the best solution. Also, your instincts may tell you more than you think. The choice between two people usually has nothing to do with them. It has to do with what you feel deep down and where you see yourself in a few years. Think about it and make the best decision or none at all. It’s up to you!
2. Pay attention to your mind too
This may seem counterintuitive, but it may work for some people who are more rational. If your heart isn’t helping you and you still love both people, give your head a chance. It can offer you a clue as to where you want to be and with whom. This is often a logical and more pragmatic option, but it can make you happier in the long run.
3. It’s okay not to make a choice
What most teens in a love triangle don’t realize is that making a decision is not required. If you are not comfortable hurting one of the people involved or you simply want to escape from this source of stress and sadness, choose no one. Instead, meet with the people involved and explain your reasons. With the right arguments, they will most likely understand and respect your decision.
To sum it all up, it’s worth noting that teenage love is by no means easier to handle than mature love, even if some might think so. All young people are fascinated with the idea of love until they experience it and realize that not everything is flowers and butterflies. There will be heartaches and disappointments, as well as tears and fights, but in the end, it’s something we all have to go through to develop emotionally. Do not be afraid to immerse yourself in your first love because there will be no other like it.