To avoid misunderstandings, we must distance ourselves from the situation, as much as possible, and perceive it as if we were foreign to it in order to have the most objective interpretation of the facts possible.
Unfortunately, it is common for a misunderstanding to tarnish the sincere and deep feelings we can have towards some people who share our life.
The consequence of this phenomenon is that the world ends up being filled with people who await the return of those they have let go, and others who dare not return even if they want to.
A misunderstanding arises from a conflict of interpretation vis-à-vis a person’s intentions. Of his way of communicating and understanding reality.
We often hear this kind of sentences in our daily life:
“Between what we think, what we have to say, what we think we say, what we really say, what we want to hear, what we hear and what we think we hear, there are many possibilities not to understand us ”.
The immense abyss that pride can create
The genesis of a misunderstanding is always caused by factors such as pride, fatigue, and lack of confidence in others, but also in oneself.
This cocktail of variables means that, when interpreting the tone of a voice that surprises us or ambiguous words, our senses perceive something hostile. While this is not necessarily the intention of the person in front of us.
To avoid this, we must be aware of the importance of letting ourselves be carried away. To value our state of mind and that of others before drawing hasty conclusions.
We all perceive conflict more calmly when we have a cool head.
In this way, we prevent our pride from obscuring our reason with emotions such as anger.
If we don’t control ourselves, we can generate a situation that will quickly overtake us.
The difference between pride and dignity
Let us continue with our reasoning. It is essential that we know the difference between pride and dignity.
Pride is selfish and negative in itself, while dignity is the foundation of respect.
That is to say, pride will attach itself especially to opinions, beliefs, and feelings to define a point of view.
Conversely, dignity seeks balance and emotional limits to protect the “me”.
However, it is not always easy to distinguish between attitudes which are worthy of dignity and those provoked by pride.
While dignity seeks to balance and equalize the opinions, feelings, and behaviors of all, pride seeks to dominate others.
The success of understanding against misunderstanding
As we have just demonstrated, it is not easy to know when our communicational motivations respond to one or the other of our states of mind.
We can also repeat what we think and feel several times. Without the person in front of us understanding what we are trying to convey to them.
This does not necessarily mean that our interlocutor is not making an effort. But it is in a place different from ours, and as a consequence, has a radically distinct perspective.
Human nature prompts us all to seek to validate and affirm our feelings, opinions, and beliefs.
If we handle this process badly, and let ourselves be carried away by our pride, we will have great difficulty in reaching mutual understanding.
Since we cannot control 100% of the variables that influence good communication, it is very important that we understand all the emotional factors that may be controlling the conflict situation we are in.
To put the pieces of the puzzle of understanding together, we must base our attitudes on respect and consideration for ourselves, but also for others.
Be responsible for what we say to avoid misunderstanding
The possibility of occurrence and the violence of anger and misunderstanding are proportional to the degree of emotional involvement that our relationship with the person in question demands of us.
The closer we are to her, the more important the interpretation she will make of our message. And so will the conclusions that we draw from his answer.
Each person interprets the words of others according to the emotional ties that they have with them.
Our expectations, personal interests, and state of mind also influence our perception of the situation.
It is therefore essential to highlight the importance of not sinking into a malaise that pushes us to accuse others of all evils.
We need to be careful about our attitude when we are in an emotional storm. And we must not turn into a systematic protester.
Misunderstandings are very painful when the interpretations that generate it result from intentional and negative emotional attributions to ourselves or to others.
Learn to walk away
If you think you are being attacked by the bad intentions of someone who resents your integrity, your best bet is to take emotional distance.
Stay away from her for a while, tolerate her differences, and never allow her to neglect your needs.
The best clue that a person has bad intentions is the gap between what they say and what they do.
However, we must always keep in mind that we cannot be 100% right when it comes to interpreting the reactions of others.
We must, therefore, be wise and take some distance. Because the only certainty that we have about others is that offered by time.