Did you think love was a universal language? You have it all wrong ! Finally, not quite… Let’s say that beyond Love with a capital A, there are lots of different ways to love, and just as many ways to show that we love. What can create some problems of communication, and of decryption within a couple if the two partners have different languages of love. So, to shed some light on the question, Talking about Love helps you decipher the five languages of love, straight out of the book by Gary Chapman, marriage counselor, and American author, ” The 5 languages of love “
Five languages for the same language!
If you are, or have already lived as a couple, you have no doubt noticed that at times, your partner’s attitude seemed very strange to you! Did you find yourself hurt in the face of the lack of demonstration of love on your part, or frustrated with the near absence of return that yours could have generated? This is, according to Gary Chapman, because we don’t all have the same way of communicating our love! And that therefore, we are sometimes not able to decipher the language of the other. And vice versa! We are in fact deaf and blind. And this, at all levels! Friendly, conjugal, family …
In order to better decode the language of others, and therefore, to give and receive their love better, it is important to know these different languages, the numbers of 5:
- The rewarding words
- Physical touch
- Quality moments
- Services rendered
We all know them, we are all able to use and understand these languages, but in more or less obvious ways. Some will seem much more intuitive and easy to decipher than others. The main thing is to understand what is our own language and what is that of our partner so that we can understand each other as well as possible.
The five languages of love
1 / The rewarding words
People who are sensitive to this language will favor words before anything else! By SMS, phone, or face to face, they will be communicating, encourage their loved ones, compliment them, declare and verbally declare their flame!
What to do with someone who is sensitive to it: Say or write love words to him, give him compliments (sincere!), Clearly encourage him.
What not to do: Speak to him abruptly, hurtfully, criticize him harshly directly, do not communicate your love to him verbally.
2 / Physical touch
We find in this category, the people most sensitive to physical affection. They will be very easily tactile with the people they love. But they will never consider living a platonic love!
What to do with someone who is sensitive to it: hugs, hugs, regular reunions, real physical intimacy.
What not to do: condemn them to forced abstinence, be physically violent, be too modest, distant, and closed to tactile demonstrations …
3 / Quality moments
For people who are sensitive to it, love begins with proximity and frequent and regular exchanges! They have this desire and need to spend time in the company of the people they love. They will hardly understand the need for distance, for freedom.
What to do with someone who is sensitive to it: give him time, just you and him/her, share moments of complicity, see you regularly in an intimate setting.
What not to do: playing dead over a more or less long period, favoring outings in large groups to the detriment of those more intimate, not being attentive to the other during your moments of accomplices.
4 / Gifts
People sensitive to this language are more open to material demonstrations of your love and theirs. Please note, these gifts do not have to be expensive,! But it is important for them to have physical gifts to materialize their love as well as yours.
What to do with someone who is sensitive to it: gifts, but personalized, which correspond to them, offered without specific reasons, or during major events.
What not to do: arrive empty-handed at birthdays and holidays, offer a mundane/empty/unwanted gift, criticize people’s materialism.
5 / Services rendered
People sensitive to this language need to show and receive their love through actions. Making a concrete effort for the other is a beautiful mark of love for them. In return, they will ask you for gestures of help that they consider legitimately reciprocal.
What to do with someone who is sensitive to it: help and support the other in daily tasks, render service for free.
What you should not do: never notice or thank the efforts made by the person, or even come to assist them in their daily tasks.