Do you think you are guilty of “serendipidating”? After “ghosting” and “haunting”, it is this new amorous behavior that is entering. This time, the term refers to people who constantly postpone the first date in the hope of meeting someone better before.
If you are single and looking for love, it is likely that you are registered on dating applications and that you chain the meetings, in the hope of finding the ideal partner.
In the era of Tinder, Bumble and Happn, it is easy to meet someone or even talk to several people at the same time, in order to put the odds on their side.
But it could be that you have developed a bad habit and that you are guilty of “serendipidating”. After ghosting, haunting and cushioning, this English term swells the ranks of the words used to describe certain specific romantic behaviors.
What is serendipidating?
Contraction of the words “serendipity” and “dating” – in French “sérendipité” (a term which designates the gift of making discoveries) and “dating” – serendipidating concerns people who constantly repel a first date, hoping to meet someone better. “This phenomenon is more and more frequent because most people want to instantly feel alchemy”, comments Samantha Burns, seduction coach.
The expert explains to the site of HuffPost: “If you only feel an average attraction to your new crush, it’s tempting to drop date and say that you will find something better soon. Generally, you keep this person in your conversations (you never know) or you excel at pushing your date indefinitely. ”
This bad habit could, unfortunately, prevent you from having a good meeting because in the end, you don’t give anyone a chance and you stay waiting for something better.
According to Alexis Meads, a seduction coach in Portland, Oregon, this technique is not so new. “I practiced it, and I almost suffered it. When my husband was single, he called it BBD: bigger and better deal,” she tells HuffPost. “The goal is to start a long-term romantic relationship, serendipidating will not get you anywhere, “says the expert.
“Life doesn’t work that way: if you postpone every job interview or every lease signing and always hope to find something better, you will never be able to make good decisions again,” she adds.
If this trend is not new, the arrival of dating applications has certainly increased this phenomenon. On each of them, the number of potential partners is rather large, which makes the choice more difficult. And in the end, when we have to get started and select one and the same person, our date becomes less attractive.
But life is made up of choices, and even if some are more difficult than others to take, you have to know how to go into the unknown!