True love is like mature love: it does not imply a dependence or a need on the other person, but decides to share his days with them for a rich experience.
We are all looking for true love. However, sometimes we have attitudes that distance him from us.
Entering a relationship out of fear of being alone, without the necessary involvement, or out of fear of losing the other can mean that true love never knocks on our door.
If these are the reasons that motivate you, love will become a limit for you, it will restrict your freedom. Love will be based on fear.
True love is different from emotional addiction
We can sometimes confuse true love with emotional dependence. It is the consequence of the creation of certain sentences like ” if you are jealous, it is that you love ” or ” love is possession ” …
This way, we judge our partner on their level of jealousy. We want him to show us that we are his property. Is this true love?
Not at all! This situation is one that limits us and prevents us from evolving. When, in reality, love allows us to become better people every day, to move forward in life, to mature.
When love limits us, its days are numbered. Because the beliefs that envelop the feeling cancel out the feeling and everything that it implies.
From the moment we consider that loving someone imposes an addiction, we do not love, we need. Therefore, we are very far from being able to find true love.
Don’t judge the past, live the present
A hallmark of true love is that it will never judge your past. In other words, the mistakes you may have made with other partners have no reason to affect your present.
If someone is with you, wanting to start a relationship and form a life project with you, there is no reason to judge your past actions if they are not part of your experience.
For example, you may have been unfaithful or emotionally dependent on a partner in the past. Maybe you weren’t the best parent, or you weren’t completely sincere in your relationship.
Either way, the person you met shouldn’t be judging all of this. She should assume that if you are aware of your past mistakes, then you’ve learned from them, been critical of yourself, and understood that you can improve yourself.
If none of this has happened, you may be afraid that the person next to you will leave you if you are too sincere, and that they will find out who you really are. If so, you must keep in mind that this is not your true love.
Be honest. Share your experiences and what you have learned from them. You are a different person than you were in the past.
So if your partner is judging you for everything you have been through, experienced, and for all the mistakes you have made, that is not what you are looking for, because it is not true love.
Looking for mature love
True love can be likened to what we know as mature love. A calmer love, with a very solid foundation, which arises once the phase of falling in love is overcome.
This love is characterized by a series of guidelines, mentioned below:
- Accept the past without judging, since it is impossible to change it. It also presupposes an experience which has given rise to enriching learning.
- Do not try to change the other, because true love involves fully accepting your partner. This is the only way to make a healthy connection and a full relationship.
- Be aware that you do not need the other to be happy, but that you have chosen them as your life partner to walk hand in hand through a complete love experience, which allows both members to enjoy and d ‘to learn together.
- Never limit the future of one of the members, but encourage the personal development of each, by pushing the other to achieve their goals.
Mature love never limits us, it invites us to grow. The feeling of being in a relationship should never make us feel that our world is stagnating or receding, but that it is moving forward.
So, have you found true love?