Infidelities can have dramatic consequences for the couple. However, we can also overcome this ordeal.
You may think you know what to do if you find out that your partner is unfaithful: you are leaving him! However, once the fait accompli, the situation may generate a lot of doubts and insecurity when making the right decision.
When an unexpected situation surprises us, the emotions that appear can confuse our common sense. All of a sudden we can feel lost and we cannot see the situation from the right perspective. However, when it comes to infidelity, we have a few tips for you to read.
Take your time before answering
As we said earlier, emotions will cloud your judgment, and you will have a hard time knowing how to react when your partner starts begging for forgiveness and asking for a second chance. Don’t stress yourself . Take your time.
We can already start by telling our spouse that this situation is completely unexpected that it is impossible for you to have a clear mind at this time and therefore to make a decision. At that point, it will already be good to express your feelings and to talk about the situation to someone around you.
It is by doing this that you can get a better perspective on the situation, clear your mind, and calm your emotions. This is how you can tell if you want to end the relationship or give it a second chance. This last possibility is nevertheless an element which must be carefully considered …
If my partner is unfaithful, should I give him a second chance?
If your spouse is unfaithful, you shouldn’t give them a second chance quickly. You have to think about it because in most cases, a second chance can mean the possibility of doing the same on your side or of blaming him for what he did and sending it back in the face.
Something you need to know, if you are willing to give your spouse a second chance, is that you absolutely must be in therapy. While you may believe that you can forgive him and not feel resentful, you may be lying to yourself.
This is why going to therapy can help you regain the confidence that is lacking in your relationship, pick up the pieces that have been broken, and keep moving forward towards a stronger, healthier relationship. Without these ingredients, it is highly likely that this second opportunity will fail.
Review your values
It is good to think about the values that we have. What do we think of infidelity? Am I still cheating on my spouse or is there something that has changed? It is generally positive to review our values and act in accordance with them.
If infidelity continues to be something unacceptable to you, forgiving your spouse will surely lead you into a relationship filled with arguments, mutual mistrust … In this case, it might be better to put it on forever. end the relationship without looking back.
Making this decision will hurt. However, not following our beliefs and accepting something that goes against our values is even more painful and results in a relationship filled with suffering.
Never stay together for the kids
Children are often a justification for forgiving the spouse who cheated on us, which forces us to go against our values. We repeat sentences like: ” I stay with him / her only for the children”, “my children need a united family ” …
All of these phrases are a way of not making the decision to end the relationship. Children will always prefer to see their parents happy, even if they are apart, rather than together and arguing all the time. Indeed, a child who sees his parents arguing constantly at home can develop serious problems as an adult.
So, if your spouse is unfaithful to you, the first thing you need to do is take the time to analyze the situation from a perspective. Next, study your values, and then finally, make a conscious decision.
You should also be aware of the fact that it is very important to see a therapist if you decide to give your spouse a second chance. This is essential, because it is the only way to ensure the success of your relationship after such an ordeal.
Any relationship must be based on a solid foundation. What do you think of infidelity? Would you be able to forgive your spouse if he cheated on you?