Many couples are together and come to a point where they wonder about the nature of their relationship. At this stage, they can no longer define whether they live together for love or simply out of habit because they cannot imagine one without the other in existence. So where is the line between love and habit?
THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LOVE AND HABIT
It is difficult to differentiate between the two, because in both cases one feels bad in the absence of one’s spouse (Didn’t Alphonse de Lamartine write: “You miss only one being and everything is depopulated ”).
How to know in a relationship that has lasted for years what it is like when your other half is away.
Does the distance from your spouse leave you with a void because you love him or because you are just used to him being present?
Indeed everything depends on your well-being. If you feel fulfilled and happy in the presence of your other half, it means that you love them.
But if his presence makes you indifferent, it means that you are just used to his presence.
YOU DON’T MISS HIM WHEN HE’S AWAY FROM YOU
Sometimes you don’t miss your spouse when they are away from you. But that doesn’t necessarily mean you don’t like it. Ask yourself the right question: am I happy when we’re together?
Do I feel good in his presence? Sometimes enjoying loneliness doesn’t call into question your love for your partner.
A feeling of lack during an absence is not an infallible indicator of love.
YOU CAN’T STAND HIM, BUT YOU CAN’T STAND HIS ABSENCE EITHER
If your partner’s presence bothers you, it means you’ve just gotten used to their presence in your life, nothing more.
So you don’t really have love for him, but there is an arm’s length relationship that has developed between you over the years.
Take a step back to reflect on your relationship and thus determine the exact feeling you have towards your spouse.
Even more dramatic, if you can’t stand its flaws. Indeed, when we are in love with a person, we close our eyes to their faults for love.
Whereas in case you’ve just gotten used to its presence, its flaws really annoy you!
WHEN LOVE IS REPLACED BY HABIT
The start of a relationship always begins with inflamed feelings (don’t we say “brand new, all beautiful”?)
the other is then necessarily attractive, desirable and arouses great interest through the curiosity that leads us to discover it.
This interest will tend to dissipate over time as whole sections of his personality or his daily life are revealed to us.
The habit will gradually creep into everyday life.
And over time, we will begin to perceive our partner as an ordinary person who shares our life.
As a result, love can often end up being replaced little by habit.
Love and habit become more difficult to distinguish, especially when it comes to long-term relationships.
This is not the case with vacation romances, which tend to start with very strong feelings that often quickly disappear because the couple do not live together and have not had time to discover life together.