Why does my ex talk or write to me and then ignore me if we have already broken up?

Would you like to know why your ex talks or writes to you and then ignores you? If you still don’t understand why they keep looking for you even though they have already broken up, you’ve come to the right place. Next, we will tell you everything you need to know about it and we will provide you with some tips and tools so that you can put into practice.

No matter how the relationships have been, separations are a painful process. Both for the person who has decided to break up and the one who has been left, they go through a stage of emotional instability. We are on a roller coaster of feelings where sadness, anguish, anger and doubt appear.

Reasons why your ex writes to you after they break up

Ending a relationship is often a complicated process and a difficult decision to make. Maybe in the moment you get carried away by your feelings and do it. The problem comes later, when we are in the process of adapting to our new reality : your new life without your partner by your side every day. That person with whom you used to share all your moments is gone.

At this point, it is when the doubt appears and one of the two tries to communicate with his ex. But what do I do if my ex-partner talks or writes to me and then ignores me if we’ve already broken up? Why does he do this? Well, for this, we are going to talk about the main reasons that are generating this situation.

Contrary to what many people tend to believe, it is men who have a much harder time leaving a relationship behind . And therefore, they are always looking to win back their exes at any cost. Even if it means adopting unhealthy or dangerous behaviors.

Wants to be your friend

This is one of the things that we least imagine, that my ex talks to me or writes to me and then ignores me because he wants to be my friend . Perhaps with the time and distance they have taken, they have realized that they want to continue to be part of your life.

However, this time he wants to do it from another point, being your friend. As a consequence, he talks or writes to you and asks how you are or what is in your life. But, he immediately realizes that it may not be a good idea and ignores you.

He may be doing this because he doesn’t really want to keep hurting you or himself by trying to get close again. At this point, try to think that maybe you can try to be friends later.

To provoke you

Another of the most frequent reasons that explain why my ex talks or writes to me and then ignores me is this. It tries to provoke you and create desire in you.

Perhaps before he or she wrote to you, you had no expectations or illusions about getting back together. But, now a message has arrived from your ex and that can stir up old feelings.

Also, he may try to provoke you because he doesn’t know how to handle his feelings. By writing to you, he is trying to transfer these emotional problems to you by playing with doubt. One day he becomes interested and suddenly ignores you. In other words, “since I still can’t clear up my emotions, neither will you.”

Fear of losing you permanently

Another reason why my ex-partner talks to me or writes to me and then ignores me is that he is afraid of losing you permanently. In this case, he has probably detected that you have a new illusion.

As a consequence, your ex partner talks or writes to you and ignores you to see if you are still thinking about him . He doesn’t want to lose you for good and wants you to feel insecure about your new relationship. But, then he ignores you because he’s not entirely sure if it’s a good idea or not to get back together.

It can also be because he wants to create a delusion to leave you with the intrigue. He wants you to have doubts about what he really wanted when he contacted you.

For fun

Are you confused because your ex partner talks or writes to you and then ignores you? Well believe us, that is an action to simply get your attention again and then be you beg for attention. It is a malevolent plan that many men carry out, because they simply are not able to accept the fact that someone broke up with them.

And yes, it turns out that it is exactly that. It has been proven that men take pride in knowing that one of their ex is getting over them . And just seeing the fair opportunity to get back in touch with you, he will. And this is a very dirty trick for you to fall back into their networks, making you believe that they still have feelings for you, when in reality all they want is to heal their wounded ego a little. 

So this is the time for you to leave all kinds of illusion behind . It took a lot of work, or you’re probably still getting through a relationship grief ! So you are vulnerable, avoid falling into their networks again and focus on healing yourself first before re-evaluating options with someone else.

Wants you to remember

There are many people who have a hard time leaving things behind. This is something that happens to men and women alike. If this is the case, your ex partner may talk or write to you and then ignore you so you remember him.

This is one of the most frequent reasons and it is one of the ways not to let you forget it or stop thinking about him or her. By trying to contact you, he is telling you that he is still there, waiting for you.

With this we want to tell you that my ex talks or writes to me and then ignores me because he does not want you to close the door and think about the possibility of getting back together. However, if he ignores you later , he may not be quite ready to go back.

Is it good to keep in touch with my ex?

Do you have an ex who is still writing to you? What does this mean? Is it good to keep in touch with him or her? Well, this is the ideal time for you to think clearly about yourself, what you want and what you need so that you do not fall into their games again.

If they finally broke up, it was for good reason. The past must be left in the past! Otherwise you will not be able to advance and you will continue to fall over and over again in the same cycle.

Generally, it is not much about whether or not it is good to keep in touch with your ex . Because you can continue doing it, as long as you have the skills to not repeat the unfavorable cycles for you. An ex is an ex! You cannot get involved with him again, under any circumstances.

Always keep in mind that if there were really any opportunities for them to stay together, they still would be. Whatever the reason, infidelity, they went their separate ways , they are not compatible … The best thing will always be to leave the past behind.

You must also take into account another very important factor when deciding whether or not it is good to continue talking to my ex. As long as the breakup is recent , it is advisable that you definitely get away from each other for a while.

Then, once both of them were able to heal their wounds, seek their own horizons, and spread their wings again and shine, perhaps they can try a new friendship. Or, try to look like old acquaintances. But, always keeping in mind that a relationship between you will not be the best option for either of you.

So, before you get back in touch with your ex, make sure you’ve definitely gotten over it. Do it, only if you are in good relationship with yourself and after you have accumulated a little more emotional health and mental maturity. Now they are separate people from each other, and therefore you should not be affected by anything he does or does not do with his life.

What to do if my ex keeps writing to me?

In case your ex continues to constantly search for you, it is best that you take drastic measures to prevent him from continuing to interrupt your day-to-day with yourself. If you have already tried to tell him that you diet your space and that he did not write to you and even so the messages and calls continue to arrive, you can choose to block his contact. 

And if necessary, block it from all the networks in which they share friendship. Because in one way and another he will try to contact you again. This should be enough to stop the messages from arriving.

My ex talks to me, but doesn’t want to come back: Is it okay for us to be friends?

If your ex talks to you, but doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you again, they may be more interested in a friendship. Why does he do this? Perhaps you were an important person in his life and you have shared many good times together.

Losing a person with whom you have spent a lot of quality time can be very painful. However, as we told you before, before trying to be friends with your ex, you must first go through that duel.

It is important that before you try to be friends, both of you are over the breakup and are emotionally stable. Otherwise, going through that duel will not be possible and they will end up having a toxic relationship.

Another key aspect of deciding whether or not it’s good to be friends with my ex is understanding why they broke up. If there is no grudge involved and they have parted on good terms, maybe they can be good friends. Know that he or she knows you better than anyone else and can be good friends.

So, to know if it is good or not to be friends with your ex, you have to evaluate each case in particular. To do this, we leave you a series of questions that will help you make this decision for yourself :

  • How do you feel about your ex partner?
  • How would I feel knowing that you are with someone else?
  • Do I regret having ended the relationship?
  • What does your friendship give me in my day to day?
  • Are there hidden intentions behind this friendship?

If, after answering these questions, you notice that all or almost all indicate that you still want to get back with your ex partner, it is not a good idea. Friendship between you is not going to work and if you try it will end worse than before.

My ex treats me well and then badly – Why is this happening?

There are times when you will feel very doubtful if your ex talks or writes to you and then ignores you. The main reason is that he still has not managed to leave you behind. He still thinks of you and misses you more than he would like.

However, you notice that afterwards he ignores or treats you badly, right? Well, this is because you have wounded pride. His wounds are still raw and he ‘s trying to defend himself . Let’s face it, nobody likes to be left because that puts our ego at stake.

Your ex partner right now is going through a roller coaster of feelings. On the one hand, he feels sad, misses you and wants to be by your side. At this moment, he is writing to you treating you well and saying nice things to you. Then you feel angry and hurt from the breakup. This is when he can go two ways: ignore you or treat you badly.

The breakup may be very recent and that is why when he tries to communicate with you, he suddenly does so with contempt. Although he is sorry and wants to return to your side, many times his ego and pride will not allow it.

Of course, nothing at all justifies mistreatment. Therefore, if your ex treats you badly, it is best to block him from all sides and prevent him from communicating. If necessary, change your number or avoid sharing everything you do on your social networks.

Talk to people you trust to help protect you by putting up a barrier. Don’t let it get close in any way again. Yes, we know, it may sound a bit drastic, but sometimes we have to take all the necessary steps to take care of ourselves.

Signs that my ex has gotten over me

As we’ve talked about before, getting over a breakup isn’t easy . Especially when we have not been the ones who have decided to put an end to it. In these situations, it is normal for us to try to hold onto the past and find a way to reverse the situation.

But what happens when my ex doesn’t want anything with me anymore? What are the signs that you have definitely outgrown me? If you want to know the answer, then pay attention to the following:

No longer looking for you

If he no longer looks for you or ignores you, it is because your ex has already definitively surpassed you. You may have tried in some way to reach out or get in touch with him or her, but there is no response whatsoever.

Avoid all the conversations he may have with you. Even though they have mutual friends or share their school, workplace, etc. To everything, he is trying to overcome you and rebuild his life.

If you send him a message and you know he has seen it, but he has decided not to reply to you, he may have outgrown you. However, you may also be doing it because you are not sure what you are feeling. So how do we find out? then evaluating the other signals.

Do not post anything about the breakup on social media

It seems that suddenly the earth has swallowed your ex because he does not post anything about the breakup on his social networks. This is another of the signs that indicate that he has definitively surpassed you.

Every time someone publishes an image, phrase or song that talks about breakups and heartbreak, it is because they still care about the subject. Otherwise, he wouldn’t waste time posting how much he misses, hates or hurt you.

It is something normal that many people tend to do to disconnect and take refuge in themselves. The main reason is that he is trying to rebuild his life by avoiding any kind of contact that brings him closer to you.

He has even decided to block you from his social networks to let you know that he does not want to know anything more with you. It is a way to protect yourself and prevent you from being able to follow any leads to him or her.

Get on with your life normally

If your ex partner continues with his life normally it is because he has already definitely overcome you. You may even have a new romance or a new illusion.

If your breakup is recent, it may seem hasty, but it doesn’t have to be. This means for him or her that they have finished their stage of grief and have decided that they are no longer with you.

He greets you like nothing when he meets you on the street

If your ex partner has gotten over you, he will definitely greet you on the street as if nothing was wrong. You have already left behind the sadness, pain or anger over the breakup.

He may have decided to just stick with the good times and remember you as someone else in his life. It is that he is no longer interested in getting back with you and, therefore, he does not have mixed emotions when seeing you again.

Evade every opportunity to meet you

Whether you share a group of friends, the workplace, or school, he will avoid any circumstance that puts him in front of you . He is trying to avoid every opportunity he has to meet you, alone or not.

It may not even interest him that you have kept any of his things . Let’s face it, we often use this pretext to get in touch with our ex-partner and try to get back. If this does not happen it is because he has truly forgotten you.

He only offers you friendship in difficult times

Finally, another of the reasons that indicate that your ex has definitely overcome you is this. He only offers his friendship to you in difficult times.

He may also do it because he feels guilty for having decided to end the relationship and for hurting you. So, try to compensate for that pain you have by staying with you or wondering how you are. In this way, you try to make your guilt go away.

So far we come with this super complete guide on why your ex talks or writes to you and then ignores you. We hope that it has been useful to you and that you can put into practice all the tips that we have shared with you.