The idea of him or really him?
Most women cannot afford to be alone. We always want someone with us to talk to, right? We love the company of other people. So sometimes in dating, we date men even though we are not sure about the etiquette of our relationship with them. That’s not all bad, but if you’re going to date a specific guy, there must be something, right?
Do not? So why are you dating him? Why do you always chat with him? Why do other people get the impression that the two of you are intimate? Do you think you like the idea of him but not really him?
But how can you tell if you just like the idea of him being there? Think about this: he is a decent man, so you will want to have him around while you look for your Mr. Perfect; Would you rather answer “I’m dating” than “I’m single” when asked about your love life; You would have someone to accompany you when your friends decide to take their partners to a meeting, and I like them. Yes, that’s what it means when you just like the idea of him – you’ll always be ready to lose him when the time comes.
However, there will be times when you are still not sure because as you spend time with him, it is not impossible for your feelings for him to develop. So, here are 10 signs and questions you might want to test yourself with to confirm if you’re starting to like him or just like the idea of him.
1. How often do you think about him?
It’s normal to think of specific people from time to time, including him. But its space in your heart determines how often it runs in your mind. When you see something you want to talk about, is he the first person you want to share it with? When you feel like doing something crazy, do you want to do it with him?
If that’s the case, he is surely more than a friend to you. You wouldn’t pay as much attention to someone you don’t like, would you? If it’s always on your mind, it’s time to consider giving your relationship a chance to take it to the next level. However, if it is the opposite, then you no longer need to be confused because it is obvious that you do not like it very much.
2. You don’t like him, when you feel too comfortable
Admit it, when you really like someone, you will sweat uncontrollably, feel nervous, or stutter while talking to them. You always have the feeling that you have to impress him.
However, if you feel too comfortable with him (wearing the simplest shirt you have, you can talk to him without brushing your teeth in the morning, you are okay with facing him without makeup) it is a sure sign that you are not trying to win. your romantic attention. You like the idea of him being around, but you are not willing to take what you have with you to the next level.
3. Do you like the idea of talking about him?
If you love a guy, any mention of his name probably sounds like you’re talking about the most important thing in the world. You would talk non-stop and discovering things about him is as always a newly acquired knowledge, right?
So watch how you react when your friends bring it up, especially when it comes to your relationship. Just shrugging and feeling too lazy to explain? If so, it’s an obvious sign that you don’t really care about their attention and just enjoy their company, but it feels weird thinking about your intimacy.
4. You don’t tell your friends about him
Ladies, admit it, some of us think that getting into a relationship is a competition between best friends. When you meet someone you like, you will immediately text your friends about them. You’ll probably even say “he’s the one!” But when you feel the opposite and avoid mentioning anything about him, even to your closest friends, it means that you just don’t like him and you don’t want anything to develop between the two of you.
5. You don’t care what will happen
Because we pay attention and spend a lot of time with them, it is not impossible for the relationship to develop gradually over time. If you feel that you are really starting to like it, you will care about the results and you will try a little so that everything ends well. But if you just shrug off the thought that your relationship with him might fail or the thought of losing him in the future, then you don’t like him at all.
You have to really think about your feelings in this certain situation because there are people who only confirm their feelings after losing the person, Or you may not mind losing the opportunity to have a romantic relationship with him, but you may feel hurt at the thought of even losing your friendship and you will end up alone.
6. You don’t worry about red flags
When you feel that you are starting to fall in love with a guy, you will notice everything he does and says and you will become sensitive to even the simplest gestures. You will remember when he takes you for granted, you will remember when he tries to flirt with another woman, you will remember when he does not laugh at your jokes, etc. Every little bad thing you do will stick in your mind. And that’s completely normal if you like someone.
However, if you don’t see any red flags about it; or if there are, but you don’t care, then there’s no need to question whether you like it or not because it’s sure to be the latter.
7. People outside the relationship just don’t feel it
After being single and a little lonely for a while, your friends will immediately support you when they see you dating a guy. They will probably tell you endlessly not to lose him anymore. But if they feel surprised or raise their eyebrows instead of being happy for you, then surely there is something between you and the guy.
Sometimes it’s the outsiders who can see what’s going on first. So if your friends don’t feel it, you don’t. There is no need to question your emotions because you just like the idea of him, but not really his.
8. You don’t get excited about their messages
If we are in love with someone, the best thing we could probably receive is their text messages. Hey, don’t think it’s ridiculous, you know you’ve felt it once. When someone is really special to us, even a simple “good morning” or a “hello” from him brings us total excitement and happiness. But if your only reaction to his messages and talks is to shrug your shoulders, it’s a sure sign that you don’t like him and would rather wait a little longer and feel lonely than the idea of being in a relationship with him.
9. Not willing to make physical contact
You do not need to self-assess whether this specific sign is obviously present. There is nothing better to know if you really like him than to have imaginations of intimate physical contact with him.
10. You still have dating apps on your phone
Nowadays, it is very easy to find someone you can date thanks to the many dating applications that we can download from the Internet such as Tinder, Grindr and Bumble! And don’t deny it, you’ve probably tried them once.
If you are already falling in love with someone, surely there is no need to use these dating apps, right? As soon as you get down to it, you’ll remove these apps in no time. However, if you feel the need to use it from time to time, it is because there is something missing in your feelings for it. Maybe you like the idea of him being around, but not the idea of dating him romantically.
Am I still confused?
Are these signs present? If so, there is a greater chance that you really don’t like him and are comfortable with his company. However, if after reading this, you are still questioning your feelings for him, then you probably like him very much in a romantic way, but you are only denying him for whatever reasons you have, maybe you are still hurting from your past relationships. , you’re not ready to go on a date yet, etc. because think about this, you won’t have to ask him if you really don’t like him, don’t you think?
The best way to find out is to gradually give your relationship a chance. And what if they don’t end up together? At least you found the answer!
