13 Things You Should Keep From Telling Your Partner

While open communication is vital in a relationship, there are certain topics and details that are best left unsaid. Maintaining a level of privacy and discretion can help preserve the intimacy and trust within the partnership. Here are 13 things you should consider keeping from telling your partner:

1. Past Romantic Encounters

  • Detailed accounts of past romantic experiences can lead to unnecessary comparisons and feelings of insecurity. It’s generally best to maintain a level of discretion regarding these encounters unless directly relevant to the current relationship.

2. Negative Opinions About Their Family

  • Criticizing or expressing negative opinions about your partner’s family members can strain the relationship and create unnecessary tension.

3. Financial Secrets

  • While financial transparency is important, personal financial matters such as individual savings, personal spending, or debts that do not directly impact the relationship may be best kept private.

4. Intimate Details About Friends

  • Sharing intimate or sensitive details about mutual friends or acquaintances without their consent can breach their privacy and lead to unnecessary complications.

5. Physical Attraction to Others

  • Expressing detailed or ongoing attraction to others can stir feelings of jealousy and insecurity within the relationship.

6. Past Mistakes of Theirs You’ve Uncovered

  • If you stumble upon past mistakes or secrets of your partner that don’t directly impact the present, consider whether disclosing this information will bring constructive resolution or unnecessary pain.

7. Negative Inner Monologues About Them

  • It’s natural to have occasional negative thoughts, but sharing every fleeting doubt or criticism can erode the trust and confidence within the relationship.

8. Comparisons to Ex-Partners

  • Drawing comparisons between your current partner and past relationships can lead to feelings of inadequacy and breed unnecessary tension.

9. Your Attraction to Someone Else

  • Sharing ongoing attraction to someone outside the relationship can lead to distrust and hurt feelings, even if it’s a passing sentiment.

10. Non-Relevant Details About Your Experiences

  • Not every personal experience or thought needs to be shared. Consider whether the information is truly relevant to the current relationship before disclosing it.

11. Past Transgressions of Theirs You’ve Forgiven

  • If you’ve chosen to forgive past mistakes or transgressions, consider whether bringing up these issues will contribute positively to the relationship or cause unnecessary distress.

12. Personal Insecurities You’re Working Through

  • While it’s important to be open about your feelings, expressing every personal insecurity without a constructive purpose can create a burden on the relationship.

13. Harmless White Lies

  • While honesty is crucial, there are instances where harmless white lies, such as pretending to enjoy a meal they’ve prepared, can spare unnecessary discomfort and maintain harmony.

Context and Consideration

It’s important to note that the decision to withhold certain details from your partner should not be rooted in deception or manipulation. Rather, it should stem from a place of respect, consideration, and the understanding that not every thought or experience needs to be shared to preserve the intimacy and trust within the relationship.

Building Trust Through Respectful Communication

Open Dialogue:

  • Encourage open dialogue about the boundaries and level of disclosure that both partners are comfortable with, fostering an environment of mutual understanding and respect.

Respecting Individual Privacy:

  • Acknowledge and respect each other’s individual privacy and autonomy, understanding that certain aspects of personal life may not need to be fully disclosed within the relationship.

Considerate Disclosure:

  • Exercise discretion and consider whether disclosing certain information will positively contribute to the relationship or potentially cause unnecessary distress.


While open communication is fundamental in a relationship, thoughtful discretion plays an equally pivotal role in preserving intimacy and trust. By carefully considering the relevance and impact of the information being shared, both partners can foster a deeper level of understanding and respect, enhancing the overall strength and harmony of the relationship. Remember, healthy boundaries and respectful communication are key to nurturing a strong and enduring partnership.