I used to confuse these two terms, like most of you, I guess. They mix so easily.
Not only as terms but also as feelings.
I lost so much time crying on men who have never been good to me from the start. I really thought that by losing them, I had lost love.
I could not have been more wrong.
Only when I met my soulmate did I really understand the difference between being in love and loving someone.
Nothing that I have felt before can match what I feel now.
You see, “being in love” is a form of addiction that we feel towards someone.
We are so carried away by them that they are everything we can think of. We want to be near them as often as possible.
To love someone is what we have when reality sets in when our hormones stop racing. It’s not an addiction, it’s the reality.
It’s a question of mutual happiness and growth. It is a question of complementing each other. It’s the best thing in the world.
To make everything clearer, let’s look at the 6 differences between being in love and loving someone:
We fall in love involuntarily, while loving someone is a choice
Falling in love is out of our control. It’s a question of chemistry, desire, and craze. It’s about idealizing the other and putting it on a pedestal.
To love someone is what comes after all craze, chemistry, and desire. It is an emotional connection that we form.
It’s not about treating your partner as a form of perfection. It is to know that they have faults and to love them anyway.
It’s about choosing to stay even when the sunny days go by.
Being in love is a matter of convenience, whereas to love someone is to give them priority
To be in love is to need someone to satisfy one’s needs. It’s to be there when it’s convenient.
To love, on the other hand, is disinterested. It’s not just about taking, it’s about giving.
It’s about taking time for someone. It’s all about enjoying the fact that your other half is there. It is to make her feel important.
When we are in love we can be needy whereas when we love someone, we never are
It’s in our human nature to have all kinds of expectations from people.
It’s the same when you’re in love. We expect a person to behave in a certain way.
For example, we might want them to call or send SMS 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
One can expect great romantic gestures and constant displays of affection.
However, the reality could be different. That’s why our unsatisfied expectations are the most common reasons for the breakup.
To love someone is a question of compatibility. It’s a question of mutual understanding.
It’s not having news of each other 24 hours a day, but still knowing that you are loved.
When we love everything is about trust, while when we are in love, not necessarily
Being in love can also be full of uncertainties. We do not need to feel safe or trust the other person completely to fall in love with her.
We fall and hope they will catch us.
True love, however, is built on trust.
There is no room for uncertainty or jealousy. We feel safe in their embrace, and we want that person to feel the same for us.
To be in love is to possess, whereas to love someone is to free him
Being in love often gives us the misconception that we owe something to another person. That they belong to us.
We hold them too tight because they are the main creators of our happiness.
That’s why sometimes we sabotage our own chances of finding true love. We force the feelings.
We stifle our partners by wanting them too close.
To love someone is to give them the freedom to love you in return. It’s not about trying to keep them in your life.
It’s about loving them, whether they are at your side or not.
True love should flow, and you should never have to beg the attention, affection or presence of anyone in your life.
It’s about working in a team and growing together.
Being in love does not always last, while love can be eternal
Being in love can last longer or shorter, but it’s over. It’s based on passion, desire, brain chemicals that give us that addictive feeling of desire.
Love does not evaporate. It does not diminish. He does not go away.
Love remains whatever happens. It’s constant, even though the honeymoon phase of the relationship is ancient history.
At the end of the day, it’s important to remember that under no circumstances does loving and loving someone exclude self-love.
On the contrary, they welcome him.
Only when you truly love, accept, and enjoy yourself can you give these same pure feelings to another person.