Humans seek to connect and form relationships with others, but having and maintaining a relationship is difficult.
Psychological studies have confirmed that highly intelligent people have different ways of channeling their emotions and seeing life, and perhaps that is why they have difficulties interacting with others.
Next, we will tell you the 15 reasons that explain why intelligent people struggle with love.
Reason # 1: They overthink everything
People who are very intelligent analyze everything carefully, and more in a matter of love. They review again and again every detail of the person they like, the pros and cons of a possible relationship, and how viable it would be for each of those involved.
This leads them to overanalyze things instead of just taking action. It may be precisely this elevated intelligence that ends up making them indecisive or causing them to take too long to react. Also, the other person may interpret this as an attitude of disinterest and simply walk away.
Reason # 2: They prioritize their life goals
Smart people have many goals and life projects, and falling in love is not usually a priority for them, since they are focused on other particular objectives.
If after analyzing the characteristics of the person they like and the possible scenarios, they realize that the relationship will not help them achieve their goals, they choose not to venture out and stay alone. They value, above all, being able to achieve their dreams.
Reason # 3: They are guided more by reason than by heart
Very intelligent people are unlikely to get carried away by the impulses of the heart. Nothing of that! They are so rational that they always trust their brain analyzes and don’t trust their feelings, because they think they are misleading.
So before getting carried away by “hunches or hunches”, they prefer to use logic and the evaluation of the facts, in order to reduce the probability of being wrong. These make others see them as cold people with few feelings and feel suspicious of relating to them.
Reason #4: they love their independence
If something characterizes intelligent people, it is their independent nature. This intellectual trait makes them self-sufficient people, who hardly require others on a social or emotional level.
Fewer still consider that they need someone by their side to feel fulfilled and fulfilled. On the contrary, they shy away from any situation that could endanger their independence, such as a relationship with someone who could rob them of their autonomy in their decisions, or who seeks to control them.
Smart people are very comfortable with themselves. Your individual peace and tranquility is valued above anyone else.
So to establish a relationship they have to be sure that the other person is mature enough — and not controlled at all — to give them their space and respect their independence.
Reason #5: They tend to bully others
The perception that others have about intelligent people is that they are very intimidating, so the common individual tends to be afraid of them and not follow after them. The big reason is that they fear that they will be rejected for not being “up to it”.
Although intelligent people project airs of superiority, demand, and good taste, deep down they are very emotional beings, with very fragile feelings. Their attitude actually serves as a protective barrier.
So, if you like a very intelligent person, you just have to be patient and wait for her to feel confident in you to be able to open the doors of her life and her heart to you.
Reason # 6: They hate being limited or restricted
Smart people literally hate being restricted or limited in times when they give free rein to their free expression. They also hate being told what to do and what not to do.
These are individuals who need someone by their side who understands them, who knows that they need their space and time. Although they love someone very much, they prefer to sacrifice the relationship in order to keep their freedom intact.
Reason # 7: They can get bored with their partner
Smart people are always in constant search of new stimuli. It happens with people that once they find them, they understand them and can no longer get anything new from them, they get bored. So they prefer to go out in search of a new challenge, that is, different experiences with different people.
The same goes for your love relationships. They find someone interesting, find out all about his fascinating personality, and the magic is completely lost.
eye! It is not that they are going to be unfaithful, but simply because they feel bored, they choose to end the relationship. That’s why smart people don’t tend to have long-term relationships.
Reason # 8: Your partner standards are too high
Intelligent individuals are very demanding with respect to the type of people they surround themselves with, and more so when it comes to love relationships. So they will hardly be satisfied “with what comes.”
For smart people, making everything in their life perfect is one of their biggest goals. They don’t settle for less. So they will not hesitate to miss one, two, three, and more opportunities for a couple, if they consider that it is not the exact person who should be by their side.
And since being alone is a very obvious possibility because of this attitude, they are not afraid of loneliness either. That doesn’t bother them at all.
Reason # 9: they hide behind a shell to protect themselves
Intelligent people find it difficult to open up to others, so it seems that they build a wall that separates them from others.
They are usually quite suspicious and hardly share important personal information with others. They think a lot about the past, especially in those situations where they got hurt. Therefore, they protect themselves with suspicion to avoid being hurt again.
This closed-in attitude leads them to project an image of cold and distant people. Deep down, they are afraid of falling in love because they simply do not want to suffer or be hurt by other people.
Reason # 10: They are difficult to understand
The smarter a person is, the more things they tend to have in their head, and sometimes the flow of their thought is too fast or difficult for others to understand.
This causes communication difficulties that lead them to think that they are simply not compatible with others, although, in reality, they feel very attracted on a physical and emotional level. Therefore, they choose to interact with other individuals who can keep up with their intellectual rhythm, but in these cases, it is often the ego that ends up ruining relationships.
So yes! an excess of intelligence can make it more difficult to relate not only to normal people but also to other highly intelligent people.
Reason # 11: They are very suspicious
Suspicion is an innate characteristic of intelligent people. That is, we are facing individuals who put everything under a detective magnifying glass: situations, decisions, and people.
Before formulating a project or making a decision, they analyze well those suspicious vestiges that make them doubt or mistrust the viability of the matter or the true intentions of others.
Do you think the picture will be different when it comes to choosing a partner? Well no! If it is that someone with whom they plan to share their life, this feature becomes even more acute, as they tend to sharpen the magnifying glass more in the actions and words of their potential partner, trying to find the smallest detail that confirms deception, lies or distrust, in order to immediately discard the candidate.
Essentially, highly intelligent people avoid getting hurt by other people as much as possible.
Reason # 12: Beauty is not the main attribute they fixate on
Let’s be logical: what do you think an intelligent person is primarily interested in? Exactly! In intelligence! So when they meet someone for whom they feel some type of attraction or connection, they are in charge of determining if he is the right person for them based on the intelligence they demonstrate.
Intelligent people do not care so much about physical beauty or appearance, as about intellect and personality. In fact, they tend to think that people who groom themselves or take care of themselves are superficial and vain.
That is why they have no qualms about waiting as long as it takes to meet someone up to their intellect, which in the end is not always positive, because most people get bored of waiting and just leave. And consequently, most smart people end up alone.
Reason # 13: they are very sincere
If something characterizes very intelligent people in a decisive way, it is their commitment to the truth. They are not afraid to express their beliefs and opinions, no matter how risky and daring they may seem. It’s like they can’t shut their minds.
This, of course, will not always be a positive thing, because at times they can seem rude and offensive. So if they cannot measure the scope of their words, this will bring discomfort in the couple’s relationship.
We know that to have a healthy relationship you have to learn to give in, learn to express yourself, and learn to shut up when necessary. But for an intelligent person, this is extremely difficult.
Reason # 14: they don’t like to lose
Another characteristic that almost all smart people share is that they don’t like to lose. Feeling dejected in an argument or situation represents a great failure in their lives.
But let’s be honest: in matters of a couple, for the relationship to be as satisfactory and healthy as possible, it must be recognized that not all “fights” can be won and that, even if you are right, you have to learn to give in to guarantee peace, which in the end is the most important thing.
For a very intelligent person, it is very difficult to understand that in a couple’s discussions there are no winners or losers, but two people who —behind the differences— are capable of reaching a conciliation. But not. The smart ones don’t rest until they prove they are right. And, if they remotely do not have it, they will write down that pending matter for when there is a new dispute.
It can be frustrating to have a relationship with someone very intelligent because it is simply very difficult to convey an opinion or position since the other will always have seemingly irrefutable arguments.
Reason # 15: They are single by personal choice
Finally, the last reason highly intelligent people seem more lonely and unlucky in love is that they simply voluntarily choose to be single.
That of marrying, having children, and living happily ever after often seems obsolete social standards that do not have to be bought.
Very intelligent people, as they overthink everything, weigh the pros and cons of a potential relationship with someone and if they consider that it will not “add” to their life, then they decide to stay alone.
eye! It’s not that falling in love is just a dumb thing to do, it’s just that smart people have a harder time falling in love (although finding love is hard enough for anyone, huh?).
And it is not just our opinion, psychological studies have shown that the more intelligent a person is, the more difficult it is to find a partner and maintain it over time.
So being smart has many advantages, but when it comes to emotions and feelings, the disadvantages seem to be more. Although the truth is that with a little emotional intelligence there is nothing that cannot be solved, in addition, there will always be exceptions to the rule.
If you are very intelligent or if you have fallen in love with a very intelligent person, do not be discouraged! There will always be someone worth waiting for and fighting for. Are easy things durable? I do not believe it!