The feeling of losing the man you love is terrible.
You can feel that something is wrong.
You can feel he’s unhappy … maybe he’ll even tell you he’s unhappy. Emergency! Danger! Turn on the sirens and start panicking!
Your instincts are probably telling you to love him, squeeze him, hug him and kiss him a million times so he will stay and love you again.
It makes sense…but unfortunately, it’s the wrong approach.
Worse yet, if you freak out and start smothering him with love, it will only drive him farther and farther away.
The secret to keeping a man is to keep him chasing you, not freaking out and trying a strategy exactly opposite to what he wants.
If you feel like he’s not chasing you, isn’t trying to impress you, and just seems bored or resentful about the relationship, it’s time to take a step back.
He needs his independence now and you need to give it to him.
However, in case you’re scared – because he might cheat on you or leave you for another woman – there’s something you need to know.
He won’t leave you… if you make him afraid of losing you first.
Here are 5 ways to remind him of the value you have and how much he really likes you.
As always, this is a matter of wearing the feminine attitude that says “You run after me”.
How to make him afraid of losing you:
1. Keep busy and make him work to get your attention.
Don’t be there ready for him if and when he’s ready.
Do the opposite and get busy with your own life.
Give him the independence he asked for, but get busier with your life.
Make yourself unavailable by planning activity-packed days.
Show him that he can’t get your attention whenever he wants, this is the best way to reassert his worth.
He had to work hard at first to get her attention.
Now he has to work hard once more to keep you interested.
2. Stop Giving Assurances That You’re Waiting For Him.
In the beginning, you were probably very shy when it came to making plans or admitting your attraction to him.
STOP sharing your schedule with him and STOP telling him your plans, as if you’re still in a relationship.
This is the cost of independence, after all.
He has a right to privacy and you have a right to your privacy.
In fact, the less you say, the better.
Because if he thinks you’re hiding something from him or that you’re interested in more exciting opportunities, that’s where the fear of losing you really kicks in.
3. Invest More In Your Personal Development And Drive Him Crazy.
If he has moved on or is “slowing things down” between you, now is the best time to start working on his growth in all areas.
- Start exercising away from him.
- Start taking a vacation without him.
- start a new hobby
- Look for a job promotion or ways to grow in your career and don’t share your victory with him.
Doing things to better yourself makes him want you more…but shyly excluding him from your life shows him that it might be too late to get your love back.
The more successful you seem to be without him, the more he realizes he may have made a big mistake.
4. Make him jealous by reminding him of how attractive you are.
Provoking jealousy is practically biological, especially if he still loves you.
Simply talking about how attractive or fun another man is will make him jealous.
The more he seems to ignore you, the more you should research all these other romantic opportunities.
Some women even choose to flirt with other guys in front of them.
It’s a not-so-subtle reminder that if he’s that unhappy, many other men will love his good qualities and his company.
Personally, I advise NOT to do this unless he is already flirting with other women.
This is a power game and should be used at the right time.
The truth is, you don’t even need to flirt with other men if it makes you uncomfortable.
Simply listening and talking to other men such as co-workers, friends, friends of friends, and other strangers can go a long way in getting his attention.
As always, let the men work hard to try to impress you.
He’ll remember a time when he fought hard to win you over… and he’ll realize it’s time to do it again.
5. Stop Giving Him The Things He Used To Love.
Stop showing him that you care, even though you still care.
Women who continue to give a disinterested man everything he wants are sending a strong message: please don’t walk away.
I can not live without you.
Maybe that sounds romantic, but it’s actually the opposite of what he needs to get from you right now.
You need to show him that you don’t care or that you care less now that he’s undecided about this relationship.
Stop doing the things that he depends on you or that he enjoys.
Stop giving him all that attention if he’s made it clear to you that he’s unhappy with what’s going on.
Sure, you still care about him…but stop showing that you care, stop fawning and apologizing.
It’s a matter of giving him what he wants.
A glimpse of a life he could have without you.
That’s what should scare him because he’s starting to feel like his heart is leaving him.
And yes, that’s exactly what happens when a woman stops loving a man.
She stops doing the things he loves and they stop communicating on a deeper level.
This will continue until he decides to go after it again until his heart is in him again.
I know, this sounds risky.
The last thing you want is for this strategy to backfire and watch him pack up and walk away, but I promise you that if you keep fawning over him and begging him to love you again, it won’t work.
This will only make him want more independence and less attention from you.
Now I advise you to take it slow and not do anything drastic too soon – like date someone else or be cold or cruel, but I still advise you to be strong and be willing to take a step back.
No, you don’t have to leave first, but stepping back is the right decision.
And remember, that’s all he does.
That’s what he wants.
Give him what he wants and then let him work for you again as he wants.
This is the only way to deal with a man who is having doubts about you.