Love making scenes inspired by the movie: Fifty Shades of Gray could be what inspires your fantasy, or maybe the movie The Notebook is more your style. But anyway, it’s not a myth that s ex, whether libertine or romantic, is a powerful means that develops intimacy with your partner and makes it deeper.
Even science says it. During s ex, the brain floods the body with hormones and neurochemicals, especially oxytocin, better known as the “love hormone”. Oxytocin decreases feelings of stress and dramatically increases feelings of confidence, security, bonding and love, says Mary Kay Cocharo, couple therapist based in California. Skin-to-skin contact triggers the release of these hormones, making undressing with your partner one of the quickest and easiest ways to deepen your bond, even before you take action. Also, there are additional steps you should take during s ex to strengthen contact with your partner. Here are seven simple things you can try tonight.
Make some noise, and express your pleasure:
Even if you consider yourself reserved in bed, staying silent during s ex means that you miss the opportunity to build your bond with your sweetheart. Tell your partner what makes you feel good and what doesn’t, and if you’re a little more extroverted, express the pleasure you are experiencing. Said Mary Kay Cocharo. “Whether by words or groans, you have to show that you are in the present moment with each other.”
Breathe deeply :
The breathing helps express the deeply felt fun thing you need to do in tandem with your partner to help increase the excitement, says Cocharo. “In tantric s ex, we teach people to breathe together to create more connection and more eroticism.”
Turn off your phone:
Avoid distractions at all costs. Make sure the TV is off and your phone’s ringer is silent . And don’t you dare take a break to check your texts or your voice messages. During s ex, you and your partner should be focused on each other, says Cocharo. If you don’t, you miss the opportunity to bond, or worse, you risk offending your partner.
Take pets out of your room:
Lots of people sleep with their pets in their beds, but it can be overwhelming, so your dog or cat can watch you while you make love. “If you try to look into your partner’s eyes and take a look over it, and your dog looks in your eyes, it breaks the mood,” says Cocharo. Sleep with your pets, but later.
Make your room a real sanctuary:
Your bedroom is the sacred place where you will make love and sleep and where you should always feel relaxed, says Cocharo. She suggests removing the computers and charging your cellphone overnight elsewhere. They will only distract you and deprive you of your intimacy time with your partner
Open your eyes :
Many of us close our eyes during s ex, but it is worth keeping them open for at least part of the time. “There is neuroscience which shows that when two people look into each other’s eyes, at a close distance of about 40 or 50 cm, the reactive part of the brain allows people to have a deeper connection” Cocharo explains . So the next time you hear it, look at yourself tenderly but be aware of breaking this eye contact if it starts to bother you so that it doesn’t get weird.
Plan a romantic evening:
You don’t have to have 5-star dinners every night. A fast burger can do the trick, but too much fast food is never a good thing either. “When making love, not all ‘meals’ should be ‘fast foods’, but sometimes you need a big dinner, which takes time, planning and effort,” says Cocharo. Make sure you take the time to move, flirt, tease and do foreplay. This can make s ex more enjoyable and special, which over time can help strengthen your bond with your partner.
