“There is no love, there is only evidence of love,” said the poet Pierre Reverdy. It is fine to say I love you, it is not always a proof of sufficient love within the couple. The saying goes that “only acts count”. Is it true in love? Are words just beautiful words, should a proof of love be more tangible? So how do you define true proof of love? Is it also something universal between two people who love each other? Proof of love: what is true proof of love?
Proof of love: what is true proof of love?
Declaration and commitment, the first proofs of love
Proof of love is not just something that shows up at the start of a relationship. It’s not just revealing your feelings, declaring yourself to engage in a love story. The proofs of love build the couple and accompany them throughout the relationship.
The “I love you” at the start are quickly replaced by concrete things: a commitment like living together, getting married, having a child. These acts alone are indeed proofs of love. However, this should not mean that there is nothing more to prove afterwards. We must not consider that we have nothing more to prove because we are committed or when the couple is doing well.
Little loving care: as much proof of love
Proof of love can take many forms, often very simple. A kiss, the intensity of a look, a sincere word, an “I love you” written. Sometimes it doesn’t take much to feel fully and sincerely loved.
Small proofs of love for everyday life:
Your lover finds you beautiful when you wake up naturally, you are in a photo on his phone wallpaper, he really listens to you when you talk to him. He tells you I love you or I miss you even if you were together the day before. Better yet, it detects your emotions and when you are not well …
In some cases, proof of love can be much more concrete, material, like a piece of jewelry, a candlelit dinner, a surprise trip. The main purpose of these gifts is obviously not to buy the other but to express his love. There are lots of little loving touches to surprise yourself every day.
Proof of love and the language of love
It is interesting to realize that proofs of love are the founding elements of the language of love. There are five:
- The rewarding words
- Physical touch
- Quality moments
- The gifts
- Services rendered
When you think about it, the language of love is therefore made up of evidence of the love you have for your partner. These are things we do, words we tell him, moments spent together. Compliments and sweet words, kisses and caresses, special moments, gifts and surprises, flawless presence, and comfort.
These things that we do more or less often, in a natural way, are therefore proofs of love. Only we don’t do it to prove our love every time, we do it because it’s natural, that we want to, to please.
Why do we need proof of love?
When you are in a relationship, you can feel vulnerable. The emotional issues are important, we need to reassure ourselves and this necessarily involves the behavior of the chosen one at heart. We are looking for these famous signs that prove the love of the other.
This obviously raises the question of self-esteem.
If this is weak, then the person will have the false feeling of not deserving the love that his partner has for him and will therefore constantly need proof of love. She will seek in the attitude of her material partner to reassure herself. This research can become a real need which is particularly painful to live in and create an oppressive climate within the couple.
If the couple is not well, the person who is very in love will try to track the proofs of love of his partner. This puts in place extremely strong pressure. If it is normal to prove to each other that we love each other to make the couple last, it should not become an issue or respond to pressure or a form of jealousy.
What is real proof of love today?
Today with ephemeral relationships, the couple is on the hot seat, and engagement is scary. We, therefore, seek to find proof of love par excellence to ensure that we are with the person with whom we had a few meetings. Unfortunately, some evidence no longer seems to have any real value, even the presentation to parents is no longer necessarily a sign of commitment. And even less the first night spent together!
This is why today’s relationships are endlessly tested and trust takes time to build up. Mistrust is very present and we need proof just to say that we are in a relationship!
However, in absolute terms, there is no right or wrong, true or false proof of love.
Each couple is unique, it all depends on the state of mind, the situation of the couple.
If all goes well, for example, that you are on a little cloud on a romantic vacation, it is obvious that an ” I love you” in front of a sunset will be a proof of perfect love. By cons, if the couple is not doing well then it is more complicated because the proofs of love can be misinterpreted. Indeed, an “ I love you” pronounced with indifference or a clumsy “me too” will then be rather perceived as an “I no longer know where I am”.
To each couple their proofs of love?
The real proof of love simply seems to be that which at the moment T shows us that our partner really loves us, always loves us. The small proofs of love in everyday life, these small, sometimes harmless attentions are what make us happy. They are essential for the couple and it is not compulsory to marry, to say a hundred times I love you or to have a baby to prove to the other that we love him.
For each couple, innocent proof of love can be proof of love par excellence.
It all depends on the story of the encounter, the way the couple works. For some, an “I love you” will not be enough while for others it will be the ultimate proof. A true proof of love is the assurance that your partner loves you for what you are and that he feels good in your relationship. It is this osmosis, this alchemy between you, this evidence, it is to feel loved and in confidence in the look of the other.
What if the best proof of love was not needing proof of love?
This reasoning seems bizarre and yet it is not so surprising, on the contrary. When you feel good in your relationship, in confidence, you don’t need a priori specific proofs to feel that you are on the same wavelength and that love is sincere and reciprocal.
The value of proof of love lies in its sincerity and the importance that is given to it. The more you know your partner, the more you learn about how they love. Thus, we can then invent our own love language, in pairs.