To the one who looks at me from the sky, I miss you more than you will ever know

Without you in my arms, I feel a void in my soul. I find myself searching the crowd for your face – I know it’s impossible, but I can’t help it.

Nicholas Sparks

Not a day goes by without me thinking of you. You are often on my mind and I can’t help but wonder how different life would be if you were still walking, breathing, living on this earth with us. I miss you so much.

I think of everything we could do together, the special moments we could share and the new memories we could create. I imagine what path our life would have taken if you were still there and it breaks me when I realize that it is a dream.

My heart is still foreign to the idea that you are not there.

I find myself trying to call you, an involuntary reaction to my desperate need not to accept that you are gone. It hurts, it burns my soul and I try to hold on, but the truth is, my heart is heavy and I don’t know if I will ever recover.

I know life should go on and the pain will get better over time . I know you would not want me to live my life in sorrow and pain, but I cannot help shedding tears because our memories still seem so recent and so real. I am not ready to continue my life as long as I still carry you so close to my heart.

Maybe I’m afraid of forgetting every second spent together, the sound of your voice, your laughter and even the depth of your eyes.

Even if I don’t think it’s possible, I fear that if I ever accept your departure, the memory of you will be erased.

So, I’m sorry I can’t move forward, I’m sorry to cry at night and hope for the impossible. I can’t go back in time and bring you back, but at least I can try to keep every memory of you fresh in my mind for longer.

I must believe that you look at me from paradise . I like to think that you are an angel who protects and watches over us all.

I promise to continue living my life by honoring yours. Whatever I do and wherever I go, I will always feel your radiance in my heart. I hope you will be proud of me and that wherever you are you will be able to feel how much I remember you and how much I love you.