12 things I would like to say to my soulmate

1. I have no expectations.

Even promising to love someone unconditionally is an expectation. Unattached love is the most sincere love that can exist. The rest pushes someone to get a feel for what you need.

2. I don’t want to be your whole life. 

I want to go out with my friends. I want some time alone. I want to go on trips and start plans and take long walks without having to say where I am. I want the same for you. I want each of us to keep our lives. People quickly confuse attachment with co-dependency.

 

3.  When people talk about their partners and spouses (future and current),

they usually want them to know that it is forever, no matter what. I want you to know that I don’t care about “forever”. I want you as long as I’m supposed to have you.

 

4. Thank you

Thanks for letting me spend a day with you. To share your life with me. To hold my hand. To listen to my stories, even when they are not always very funny. To always want me and be honest with me. To always help me in any way. To let me help you in return.

 

5. You can tell if someone loves you or not by two things:

the way he looks at you when you talk and the way he touches you in a non-intimate way. Never underestimate the little touches. Never overestimate your ability to convince someone that you love them when it isn’t true.

 

6. The most intimate thing I can do is read you my favorite passages from my favorite book.

7. Even the smallest parts of you are magic to me.

The way you brush your hair and sigh in your sleep, and the way your forehead wrinkles when you really think about an answer. The craziest thing about love is how much it changes your kindergarten crush.

 

8. I will not always have the same physique.

I won’t always be young and neither will you. I want to have kids and eat good food and enjoy life to the fullest.

 

9. Communication is attractive.

Talking about things is not only necessary for a healthy couple, it is also a way to fall in love with someone. Everything in life is a great gesture of communication, and the goal is to be able to respond to things that are not said.

 

10. You don’t have to love every part of me to still love who I am

(You also don’t have to change any part of me to make me look more like the person you want.) Habits, manners, and interests change, but someone’s essence doesn’t change. The people who have the deepest relationships are the ones who connect at that level, and then begin to realize that everything else is malleable. People with the deepest connections realize that no one can change anyone else except themselves.

 

11. I really hope we can do silly things like lie in bed all Sunday and ignore everyone.

12. You won’t always come first,

but that doesn’t mean you’re not the most important person in my life. True love is not about giving up everything, but wanting to pay the bills and keep food on the table, saving for the future, and maintaining your sanity so that you can be completely yourself. You deserve no less than that.