To have a fulfilling relationship, you have to stay away from unstable people. If you go out with a manipulator, the relationship will become a double-edged sword. Here are some things you can do to find out if this is your case and how to fix it.
If you are dating a manipulator, you should know that this should not be taken lightly: it is a delicate subject because these people tend to be very dangerous.
They can have the characteristics of sociopaths or psychopaths and in most cases, they love only themselves.
Discover 7 avenues here that will help you identify these people. If you find yourself in this situation, remember that it is important to analyze the reasons for this relationship and seek help out of it.
How do you know if you are dating a manipulator?
1. Your partner constantly victimizes himself
In an argument with a manipulator and no matter who is at fault, he will always end up being the victim. In the event that he is at fault, it may happen that after long discussions, he finally accepts that the fault is not yours.
The more likely it is that he finds, as always, something to deflect the fault. In the event that he does not have an apology, he will come across as someone full of regrets and accuse you of the harm you are doing to him while refusing to forgive you.
2. Your partner focuses on your weaknesses and flaws
To make sure that you will always stick with him, he will remind you of the flaws that you might not have, so that you think you actually do.
If you are dating a manipulator, they’ll show you that they’re the only person who can love you. He will make you understand that no one wants you because of your faults, and he will make you doubt yourself.
So, no matter if it hurts you, you will not leave it, precisely because of this fear that it will have sown in you.
3. Your partner creates resentment towards other people
A sure-fire way for a manipulator to make sure you’re just theirs is to make up stories or seek to get you and others to argue.
He may want you to argue with your family and friends. Sometimes he’s so convincing that you won’t be able to believe him, which is why the rest of you will walk away.
4. Your partner reacts violently when he feels pressured
When they are under social pressure and sense the failure of the discussion, the manipulators change completely.
Even if they always try to appear calm and collected, if they feel cornered, the object of mockery or compared to failure, their reaction will be bad.
You will notice changes in their facial expressions as well as in the tone of their voice, and they will be more and more offensive. In the worst case, they can happen to physical violence.
If you are dating a manipulator and you see that they are losing control, it is best to distance yourself so that they do not react against you. In this case, you will need to seek help immediately.
5. Your partner will make the decisions for you by making you believe that they are yours
Often, manipulators are given a choice between two or more options; they will pass off not making a decision as an option.
However, they will not allow the decision you make to be different from theirs, which is why they will seek a way to subtly guide you.
To get there, they will make you see the other alternatives as negative, as a risky or bad decision. They will then give you arguments so that the decision they are waiting for you to make seems to you to be the best.
The reason? If you believe that you alone made the decision and then realize that this decision was a mistake, that will be your problem and you cannot blame anyone but yourself.
6. Your partner will do everything possible so that you do not leave him
Manipulators seek to be considerate of you. They will take you away from your loved ones, buy you luxury gifts, and take you to expensive places so you don’t leave them. You may think they are listening to you, but in fact, they are not.
Everything may seem perfect, but if you contradict him or decide for him, you will discover a totally different person.
7. Your partner is very impulsive and acts disproportionately
If you date a manipulator, you will notice that when they lose control they are able to hurt you, humiliate you, and make you feel bad.
Manipulators are able to threaten you by showing intimate photos or videos of you and putting your family at risk. Unfortunately, this situation can lead to physical violence in the couple.
Now ask yourself: am I with a manipulator? If you have recognized at least 4 of the above behaviors, move away as soon as possible, as these people can be dangerous.