1. Notice the little things about him
If you want him to notice you more, why not lead by example?
Let him know that you still notice the little things about him; that he is still very interesting and fascinating to you.
Make him feel like the romance is still there and the butterflies are still there.
At the end of the day, you give what you get.
If you want more praise from your husband, if you want more time together, if you want more gentle and affectionate gestures, set an example.
Giving love can be one of the best ways to receive love in return.
2. Give him some alone time
A big difference between men and women is the need to be alone.
While we all need and crave alone time, it’s often the man in the relationship who needs it more than the woman.
This is because of several reasons: women are naturally more social and have more social bonds, while men generally learn to be happy with themselves.
Because of this, steady relationships can sometimes be difficult for a man because they tend to feel burdened with the responsibility of being someone else’s rock.
If your man has started to distance himself from you, it may seem like you have to give him more love and attention, but this may actually be pushing him further away.
Give him the space he needs to breathe.
This doesn’t mean he hates you or doesn’t like being married to you; it just means he needs time and space to relax, feel like himself again, and re-evaluate his life and all the good things it has (including you).
3. Respect who he is
When you marry a man, you may be thinking it’s time to start building your lives together, and that means welcoming each other’s wants and needs.
You may want to “fix” the things you think are bad about him – from the way he cleans the house to his politics and moral beliefs – and you can get frustrated when you start to feel like you’re getting nowhere.
But remember: you did not marry a husband. You married a man with his own thoughts, beliefs and personality.
The more you try to change him, the more he will look bad, even if you don’t have the courage to say it to your face.
If you want him to start loving you again, you need to let him be who he is.
4. Give him more incentive to make his own choices
One of the biggest reasons men stop loving their wives is that they tend to feel like they can never make their own choices again.
The woman dominates the man’s life, making all the important and secondary decisions and imposing everything – from where the artwork should hang on the wall, to the color of the family SUV.
But this drains the husband to the point where he forgets what it’s like to have a say in things.
Over time, he becomes bored with his marriage and bored with his life, because he knows that no amount of discussion can change things.
So you need to show him that he is free again to make his own decisions.
Encourage him to start making these decisions again; tell him that you need his opinion, that your thoughts count, that he has the best taste.
In short, prove to him that you really care about his opinion in the smallest of things.
5. Be spontaneous
Perhaps one of the reasons your husband doesn’t pay more attention to you is that you’re no longer the version of yourself he fell in love with: younger, livelier, and almost certainly a lot more spontaneous.
Add a little spice to your marriage by always introducing your husband to new experiences, tastes and ideas.
Prove to him that your plan isn’t just to grow old together – to do the same routines every day for the rest of their lives until they finally die.
Remember: age is just a number.
Just because you’ve been married for 5, 10, or 20 years doesn’t mean you’ve gone through everything there is to live together.
There is always something new out there – find out what it is.
6. Be positive with him
When your husband isn’t paying attention to you, it’s easy to let it affect him in a bad way and be in a bad mood all day.
But that only makes the problem worse, and the marriage gets more and more frustrating for both sides, until one of you finally gives up.
So try to be a bigger person and don’t let his lack of attention spoil your mood. Be happy, be positive, loving and kind.
Be the person who gives unconditional love, and he will notice and appreciate it right away.
He will see the error of his ways; the fact that he was ignoring a beautiful, amazing wife, and he’s going to be back in her arms at some point.
7. Give him small gifts every now and then
You’re never too old (or boring) for gifts.
Giving your husband a surprise gift for no specific reason is the easiest way to turn his head.
Show him that you still love him, despite whatever problems the two of you may have, and that you’re willing to go out of your way to try to win his love back.
It will also make him think.
Why am I ignoring my wife?
What am I doing wrong; what is she doing wrong?
Is this marriage really something I want to give up on?
Sooner or later, he will see that choosing you was the right choice and will immediately make up for lost time.
Just don’t give up, and he won’t either.
8. Pay attention to your love language
The honeymoon phase of a relationship (and then remarriage) can blind you to many things, including something very important: your partner’s love language.
It’s entirely possible that when your relationship was new, your husband was pushing himself out of his comfort zone and out of his natural love language just to please you.
If your love language is through words, and his love language is through favors, he may eventually stop pleasing you with your love language and start pleasing you with his, but you never realized that that’s how he expresses himself.
So ask yourself: is he really ignoring you or are you just not seeing his expressions of love for what they really are?
9. Invest in yourself
The hard truth is that men require much more physical attraction than women.
While women can maintain the love of marriage through emotion and bonding, men always need that level of physical attraction.
So if you’ve allowed yourself to be careless over the years, this could be the main reason your husband doesn’t give you the same love he used to.
So work on yourself.
Start working out at the gym or just commit to daily workouts at home.
Even the smallest improvements will be noticed right away, and your man’s renewed attention will be enough motivation to keep you going until you’re as fit as you’ve always been.
And who knows – his newfound love of exercise might inspire him to switch from the couch to the treadmill, too.
Renew your marriage flames over time
Rekindling the fire in a marriage that has already been put out once is not the easiest thing to do, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible.
Just because your husband isn’t as considerate as he used to be, doesn’t mean your marriage will fail.
In fact, this might be just what your relationship needed – the understanding that you can’t keep a marriage on the embers of your honeymoon alone and that you need to learn to love each other for decades, not just years.