Some time ago, your partner left you. But now, after weeks and months, you realize, “I can’t forget her!”
You desperately ask yourself:
“ Should I let go of her and try to get on with life? Or is there still a chance to (re)conquer her? ”
What if you choose one of these two paths, but HOW should you do it?
In this article, I will present you with different solutions for your lack of love, so that you can be happy again and sleep peacefully at night.
The feeling when you can’t forget
It doesn’t matter if you were a couple, if she was “just” your best friend or if you had a passionate affair with this woman:
You just can’t forget about her because you’re still in love!
You have to think about her every day, every spare minute. You imagine how nice it would be to be with her (again), in a happy relationship.
You even dream about her at night in your sleep – and when you wake up in the morning, SHE is your first thought…
Other women, on the other hand, don’t really interest him.
You may even feel like you can’t feel anything for your current girlfriend because your old love is haunted in your head.
And your lack of love can even be so strong that you can barely concentrate on work and other work obligations.
So for you as a man: it’s time to take action to do something about the pain and these tormenting thoughts!
“Why can’t I forget and let her go?”
With all that longing for love, you must be wondering what’s going on with you.
You ask yourself, “ Why can’t I forget about her? ”
After all, your relationship or friendship ended a long time ago, but the past seems to haunt you…
There may be many reasons for your desire:
- You still have strong feelings for her, whether it’s love or anger, sadness, and jealousy (of your new boyfriend).
- As a man, you don’t want to give up just yet because you believe that you are a perfect match and that she is truly right for you.
- You were never able to process the breakup properly and therefore close it because she never told you the real reasons and there are still so many unanswered questions.
- During your friendship, you never told her that you were in love with her. That’s why you want another chance to tell her how you feel about her.
- Little everyday things remind you of her all the time (e.g. objects in your apartment, other women who look like her, or places you pass by every day).
- You’ve met her again, or even see her regularly.
- She wrote to you again on WhatsApp or you read or heard from her more often because mutual friends talk about her.
- Otherwise, you feel empty and unfulfilled in life, perhaps even in spite of your new partner. You expect from the woman of your dreams that she can eliminate her inner dissatisfaction like a magical fairy.
- You are afraid of not finding another friend who will make you happy.
Decision: conquer the woman or let her go?
The big question is: how should you behave in this situation?
Should you try to win her over again? Or do you have to let it go and forget about it, finally get it out of your head?
A renewed rapprochement is only promising if the obstacles that have prevented a relationship between you are removed.
What exactly do I mean by that? Some examples:
- You are now a much more confident and attractive man. Very different from your “old you” back then, who was filled with fear, anger, and self-doubt.
- Or, in the meantime, she managed to take control of her life and would now be ready for a relationship, maybe with you too.
- At least one of you used to be partners, but you are now single and open to new ideas.
- Today she no longer lives hundreds of kilometers away, but next to you.
- As an ex-partner, you are no longer hurt and angry with each other after the breakup. Instead, you can forgive each other (even if you’ve said mean things to each other) and talk to each other again.
- She’s written to you again, so you know she’s still interested or even in love.
But have the conditions remained the same or even worsened (eg because she was taken to another man and wants to start a family)?
So you should finally let it go and forget about it, because what didn’t work then doesn’t work now.
To express this thought mathematically:
Why would you get a different result if the variables in the equation didn’t change in your favor? And!
6 steps on how you can still win him over
Can’t you forget because you’re in love and it keeps going through your head? Read this article if you want to learn from me how you can win back your ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend.
Otherwise, you must follow these rules to get the woman after all, for a happy relationship:
1. Adopt a self-confident attitude…
You probably haven’t heard or read from each other in a long time. Then you need a good reason to go back to her.
Otherwise, your (ex) girlfriend will wonder:
” Huh, why did he suddenly write to me out of the blue… the chapter with us is over, isn’t it?!” ”
But be careful, you must behave correctly now:
No attractive girl wants a man who looks unhappy and desperate. It’s as interesting as smelly socks.
This is why you should look self-confident from the start when making contact…
2. …and avoid phrases that sound desperate!
Don’t worry, the first message isn’t that difficult. Just avoid these mistakes when contacting her:
- Admit that you have to think about her all the time and you just can’t forget about her even after all this time
- Say how unhappy you are in life without her and that she would be the woman of your absolute dreams
- Begging like “ Let’s try! “Or” Give me another chance! “
- Promise you’ve changed and now you’re ready for a relationship
- You suddenly confess your love to your old “friend”, although you never told her that because you didn’t dare.
- Ask why it didn’t work out (more) between you
Such desperate and overly romantic statements just don’t sound attractive. Especially if you haven’t had contact for weeks or months.
3. Get in touch with her and awaken good memories
If you suddenly contact her after all this time, give her a plausible reason for it, one that looks as relaxed as possible.
For example, write to her on WhatsApp something like:
- “Hey, I recently looked through old photos with friends and had to think about you again. Do you still have that cute dog with the candle ears? “
- “The day before yesterday I met our old friend, so we started talking about it… Do you remember the cool nights? Legendary! “
- “I recently passed by this cafe again, where we sat for hours. Do you remember that delicious tiramisu we always had together for dessert? “
Important: as a man, never go directly to the topic of relationship and love between you. She shouldn’t think you have intentions or ulterior motives!
Remain “non-binding” and just spark positive memories so she can remember your old times together. Maybe she won’t be able to forget you and will miss you a little…
4. Write and generate interest
When she responds to your first WhatsApp message and the mood is good, write a little back and forth with her.
You should only bring up positive topics like hobbies, your exciting job, (hopefully) being well-paid, and past joint ventures.
Avoid talking about old arguments, your breakup, love, and other negative things as much as possible! You must also do without a confession of love!
Don’t always respond right away, but wait a few hours with your messages to make them uneasy.
5. Propose a face-to-face meeting
Is the chat going well, did you guys write excitedly and are you able to laugh and chat together?
So don’t be afraid to ask her out at some point. The best way to do this is to link directly to the conversation topic, for example:
“ How about we meet again at this cafe and chat about the old times over tiramisu, just like in the past? ”
6. Date: Introduce yourself as a happy man
At the meeting, you must show her through your charisma (don’t tell!) that you’ve changed. Because the word is the shadow of the action, as it is so beautifully called.
If you are really an attractive man today who leads an exciting life, there is a chance that she will fall in love (again) with you.
DON’T tell her that you can’t forget her or that you don’t want a relationship, but be relaxed and confident like a pirate on the high seas!
Have fun, tease her playfully, and flirt with her to win her over on a date! You can find many tips about this on my blog.