If you are in a relationship in which you feel that love has been lost or your partner has directly told you that they do not know why they are continuing together, here we will tell you what to do when a person no longer wants to be with you.
We are going to explain a series of steps that will help you get out of this very difficult and painful situation. In addition to this, we are going to give you tips to know if you really do not want to be with you and other tips.
1. Face and process your feelings
Allow yourself to feel and release all that you feel throughout the rejection. If you feel sad, cry; If you are angry, hit a pillow or throw it against the wall.
Do what you need to release that which clouds your senses, as long as you do not hurt absolutely anyone, including yourself.
Take some time alone to understand everything that happens on your planet.
It is essential that you consider doing it over a weekend or take a small vacation and then return to the routine with a plan drawn up that helps you solve the situation.
2. Express all your thoughts
Tell someone you trust how you feel; Thus, you will begin to work on those emotions by defining them with words. It will serve as a therapy to vent, ask for advice and clarify your thoughts somewhat.
In case you have absolutely no one to chat with and you don’t want to or can’t go to a health professional, then write down everything that bothers you in a journal. Imagine that you are writing a letter to someone.
Identify the negative thoughts that tie you into the cycle that makes you feel miserable and work on that to transform it into a more realistic idea.
For example, if you reproach yourself that you have been stupid for telling him that you loved him first, change it because you were frank and courageous in accepting your feelings. Repeat that new sentence in your psyche until the moment you believe it and work with the next one until the moment you solve each and every one.
3. Identify what you have learned in the relationship
Once you’ve identified and dealt with your feelings, it’s time to start looking at the bright side of the situation. How? Through a list of everything you have grown in that relationship, such as:
- You have learned what gender of the person you like.
- Your communication skills have altered.
- You have managed to do introspection, thanks to this situation in which everything seemed negative.
It is essential that if negative aspects come to your psyche, you try to see the positive side. As difficult as it may seem to you, every situation has a good side and, therefore, learning that makes you grow as a person.
4. Set clear boundaries and enforce them
You may have the term that an ultimatum is a bad thing, but if you do it as setting limits to protect yourself, then you have no reason to fear.
If your partner is offended, victimized, or claims that they will comply and do not, then it is time to start meditating on your well-being.
You must be clear about what you want from your partner in a relationship. If you communicate your wishes and your partner ignores them or cannot fulfill them, you should go.
Honoring what is not debatable for you is the cornerstone of healthy self-esteem.
5. Don’t bet your future on someone else’s potential
People mature and evolve during a relationship.
However, after the first year or so, the desire to share life, the depth of feelings, and the enthusiasm for commitment will surely not grow exponentially.
Is what you receive now enough for you? Is it the person in front of you that you really want? Or are you waiting for it to suit your fantasy of who it might be?
Be realistic and objective. Remember that to be happy with others, you must first be happy with yourself.
6. Accept that you must let that person go
When someone doesn’t want you in their life, the best thing you can do is admit it and separate. You cannot force absolutely anyone to love you and you cannot stay in a place where you are neither accepted nor loved, since you would only suffer and you are worth a lot.
In case you are confused thinking: “he does not want to be with me anymore he looks for me” or “he says he loves me but he does not want to be with me”, we give you exactly the same advice: value yourself and break with that relationship.
It may take time to think and make the resolution, but at some point, you must give yourself your value, love yourself and show it with actions.
7. Stay busy to avoid focusing on that person
Look for rewarding activities that make you thrive as a person and as a professional.
Enroll in that class in which you have always wanted to participate at all times, join the gym, join a club that you like… The possibilities are many; You just have to locate what you like and also go for this reason.
If you do activities throughout the day, then you will have less time to meditate on that person and, in this way, your rejection and the occasional breakdown of the relationship will hurt less.
8. Do exercises to build self-esteem
This is also something you must do from the moment you become aware that you must let go of that person, inasmuch as the longer you feel rejected, the more hurt your self-esteem will be.
You can say at least one authentic compliment daily, take more care of your personal image, do photo challenges to learn to love yourself, create a weblog in which you write your anecdotes…
Forgive yourself for each and every time you have treated yourself badly, set realistic goals, and don’t be hard on yourself.
Another option to strengthen your self-esteem is to go to therapy with a professional, who will point out techniques that help you feel good about yourself and admit yourself for who you are.